Is Mr. Right Now really good enough?
It would be great if every single one of us knew our worth and had extremely high standards, especially when it came to love. Unfortunately, we don’t always hold out for the best possible choice. We settle for less than rather than have nothing.
There are times when it’s been a while since our last relationship and it feels like someone, anyone, is better than no one. When you’re lonely and tired of being alone, you don’t have the energy to work towards making your relationship better or refusing to take someone who’s second best.
You know the saying that he may not be Mr. Right but he’s Mr. Right Now? The fact is that you can decide that you’re only going to be with someone for a short time, but the relationship hangs on for well past its stale date.
You know you should have ended things a long time ago but it’s gotten comfortable. And while there are no surprises, there aren’t any traumatic shocks either.
You may have had the perfect partner in the past, but something happened and now you have no faith that you’ll ever meet someone that amazing again. So, you lower your standards, knowing it would kill you to lose someone like that for a second time.
And if things are going that great in your life, you may not have the confidence to aim for a better partner. You know that your life is a mess, that you don’t want to burden anyone to save you, and you know that you must do it yourself. You just need the tiniest bit of support from someone that is less than what you deserve and more than a booty call.
Whatever your reasons are for settling, know that it’s OK and that beating yourself up about it won’t help you.
Hopefully, you won’t settle forever and one day you’ll hold out for someone that is perfect on many levels, who loves you unconditionally and makes you smile every day.
Here’s why we settle for less, based on your zodiac sign.
You get love and lust mixed up. You can be a stimulation junkie and there are times when things like the chase or fighting can seem like love because of the rush that it gives you. Sure, it can be exciting to fight and then have hot makeup sex, but it's not healthy if you have to be at each other's throats to feel passion. When someone hurts you, especially for sport, that's not love — that's an expression of psychosis.
You want to be loved so badly that you're willing to make allowances. You try to convince yourself that it doesn't matter if you don't share the same values or have anything in common because they're so into you. You need to realize your own worth and that it will cost you your self-esteem if you settle for someone just because they're there. Throw this one back because there's someone incredible out there for you.
Sometimes you're feeling good about yourself and other times not so much. It's that two-sided personality of yours. When you lower your standards, the side of you that isn't happy with yourself is dominant and you tend to settle for less than you deserve. Stop the negative thinking and see that you deserve the best.
Once you get attached to someone, it's very difficult for you to detach yourself. You spend a lot of time investing in someone and once it's done, it would practically take a bomb for you to disengage. You get scared that you'll never have another opportunity for love and you believe that someone is better than no one.
This is one case where your neediness may help you out. If you emotionally suffocate them by holding on too tightly, they may leave you. Hopefully, your next relationship will be healthier.
You get mesmerized by how good-looking someone is and you can end up with someone whose insides don't match the beauty of their outsides. It's fine to appreciate beauty, but that doesn't mean you need to commit to them. You need to find someone who is the whole package, not someone who is only good at being arm candy. You get bored when they have nothing interesting to say and only talk about what happened at the gym.
You're hypercritical of yourself so that when someone is critical of you, you decide that they must be smart and intuitive. No, they're just being assh*les. Don't justify them treating you poorly by thinking you must have messed up in some way for them to treat you like garbage. Do the research and you'll find that this overly critical dynamic is not what makes a healthy relationship.
Dumping someone, even someone who isn't up to your standards, would involve conflict, so you avoid it. You tend to let problems fester until you're forced to deal with them, but by that time they've created even more damage. You'd rather be treated like crap than work on whatever issues you and your partner have. Stand up for yourself — sometimes confrontation is necessary.
You never let go because once you've fallen for someone, there's no chance that you'll let them go willingly, even if they're not right for you. You'll work non-stop trying to fix the problem, no matter how much it consumes you. Sometimes letting someone go is the healthiest thing you can do for the both of you.
You don't want to put in the time to get to know someone before committing — you have things you want to do. You're impatient but it's not a good idea to rush things because you may end up with someone that's entirely unsuitable for you. Then when you get unhappy with them, you just put off dealing with the situation. Your breakups tend to be long and drawn out.
You have an uncanny knack for choosing the wrong person for you. You're usually so sensible and reliable, but when your heart gets involved, you tend to make the worst decisions when it comes to love. Once you catch on to how disastrous the relationship is, you'll work whatever angle you can to end it but it will take an excruciating amount of time.
You try to see the specialness of everyone, even those who are taking advantage of you and treating you terribly. You become blind to their flaws and then refuse to admit that the relationship is terrible, especially if those around you are encouraging a breakup. You don't like to be told what to do, even if it's in your best interest. You'd rather stay in a bad relationship than admit that you're wrong.
You like to do things for others, even at your own expense. When someone is using you and taking advantage of you repeatedly, you still are trusting and giving enough to allow them to do it again. You will go out of your way to avoid hurting someone, even if they're hurting you even more.