I CANNOT EVEN ...
If you are eating something or drinking something right now, I humbly beseech to stop.
Trust me. It's for your own good.
A woman in India woke up in the middle of the night because she felt something crawling in her skull.
I just. I can't. I. WHAT?
Pretty confident that something deeply messed up was happening to her inside parts, she got up and went to the hospital.
What did the doctors find?
A living cockroach just chilling in her skull, between her eyes, pretty damn close to her brain.
NO BIG DEAL, TOTALLY NORMAL YOU GUYS.
*Rolls into fetal position begins sobbing and never stops probably*
It took the surgeons on staff 45 minutes to get to the squirmy little monster inside of her skull.
Apparently, it had taken up residence 12 hours earlier (THAT IS LIKE HALF A DAY TOO LONG FOR A ROACH TO BE IN ANYONE'S BRAIN) and had been chilling ever since.
They think the roach in question decided it would be a good idea TO CLIMB UP HER NOSE WHILE SHE SLEPT and get all nice and buried in her skull.
If the cockroach had (I CANNOT EVEN TYPE THIS YOU GUYS, SERIOUSLY) died inside of her skull, the woman in question could have gotten a crazy dangerous brain infection that might have led to her death.
Ways I do not want to die: a brain infection caused by the rotting carcass of the roach that crawled inside my skull.
In case you read all of this and were like, "well at least there is no video that exists of this atrocity", I'm sorry to inform you that there is, and as a person who writes on the internet for a living, it is now my responsibility to share this living nightmare with you, the people.
Hold your applause.
Sorry for the delay. I horror-fainted (totally a thing), but I'm back now.
If you want a little consolation, the surgeon who removed the bug, Dr. M. N. Shankar says that in his 30 years of practicing medicine this was the first time he's encountered a skull-roach.
Sorry, Dr. Shankar, the damage has already been done, and I am now reliving every single time a bug has gotten too close to my nose and/or ears thinking about the horrifying death that could have befallen me.
When I was a kid, someone once told me that in your lifetime you will eat eight spiders in your sleep. I wouldn't find out for decades that this was just a myth, which is a real shame given that I was probably AWAKE FOR ALL OF THOSE DECADES QUIVERING WITH FEAR IN MY BED.
Having read this story and seen this video I can confidently state that the next couple of decades will be woefully void of anything involving this "sleep" of which I hear so many people speak.