Don't Waste Your Time With ANYONE Who Makes You Feel Generic

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Don’t Waste Your Time On Anyone Who Makes You Feel Generic
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Jars are replaceable. 80s sitcom characters are replaceable. You're not.

Basic bitch. Goth girl. Weird emo girl. Wannabe geek girl. We all have had at least one moment where people decided to slap a label on us. To a point, it's understandable.

Whether we want to admit it or not, we all can kind of fit into a stereotype or two. It's just the way things are. You can't really not be a stereotype from time to time. It sounds so high school, but it's true even beyond those years.

The problem with being stereotyped is that it suggests you're interchangeable with someone else. It suggests you're "just another raver," or "some mommy type." In a label, we forget the person's humanity. That's why so many people are against labels they ignore the fact that you're a real person and not a jar.


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Even the most stereotypical person has their own unique quirks that make them a one-of-a-kind individual. You are so much more than the mold that people put you into or the label that people slap on you. You should know that. After all, you know yourself well enough to know that you're not a two-dimensional individual, right?

Dating has a weird way of labeling us. We might swipe right on the "cute surfer," but swipe left on the "stock broker type." Though we might not know the inner workings of "surfer" versus "stock broker," it's the packaging that matters in those first couple of stages. After all, first impressions do count a lot more than we want to admit.

But in an ideal world, once the first couple of dates are over, we stop just being a generic "soccer mom" or "hipster chick" to the people we're seeing. We always hope that they start seeing us as the multifaceted people we are. This is, in fact, the way things are supposed to go, right? Of course.

Unfortunately, the way things are supposed to go and the way things actually go are often two completely different things.

What I've seen with many guys is that they never really move past seeing other people as stereotypes. They see women as interchangeable. They see them as replaceable simply because they're "just another crazy basic bitch." So if they don't get along with one soccer mommy type, they act like she's replaceable because, in their minds, she is. Though they may talk about how "unique" and "special" their date is, you can often feel their real opinion in the way that they treat you.

These kinds of guys treat girls in a formulaic fashion because they don't see past a generic stereotype. In fact, they'll often assume things or even correct you if you say that you don't agree with certain stereotypes.


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These are the kind of dates who will try to buy a hipster girl organic fair trade coffee without asking if she even drinks coffee. These are the kind of dates who will bring a soccer mom to a couples' yoga class without even asking if she enjoys yoga. These are the dates that fetishize you based on race, lifestyle, or even career. These are the kind of guys who, when angered, dismiss your feelings as, "Typical overly emo club kid!"

If you really match up with a certain stereotype, it can be fun. But there's a huge problem with people like this, even if you are OK with being labeled. The issue is that you will NEVER be more than a toy to them. To them, you are a character in a script they have written, and if you step outside of that script, they will replace you. Why? Because if you act outside your stereotype, they will see you as broken.

To people like this, you function as their ideal form of Manic Pixie Dream Girl and that means they will never really look beyond your stereotype. They will make sure you know that you're replaceable, because they actually will believe that you HAVE to act a certain way. They don't really care deeply enough to scratch beyond the surface.

As we all know, you're more than just some poorly written character in an 80s teen movie. You're not a jar that was mass manufactured in a factory. You're a human being and it's time that you find someone who sees that. After all, you're a premium person, and that's way better than the "generic" version, any day of the week.

 

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