Pass the tissues, please.
Want to know a secret trick to stop yourself from crying when you feel the tears coming on?
Apparently, all you need to do to stop the onset of crying is pinch the skin between your thumb and index finger.
Not squeeze, pinch it, pinch it as hard as you can!
Did you draw blood? Then you have pinched it too hard. It probably hurts so much that you have started crying, thus defeating the entire purpose of this trick.
I don't know about you, but when it comes to crying I'm a pretty light touch.
I tear up during that one dog food commercial where the voice of the dog discusses how they made their owner happy after a bad day. You know the one:
WHY DID I WATCH IT AGAIN, GAH!
I cry when I'm sad (duh) and sometimes I cry because I am tired, hungry, or horny. I'm like a big sexy baby adult type of creature.
But most unfortunately of all, I start crying when I'm angry.
The idea of pinching the skin between your thumb and index fingers to stop crying is enjoying popularity on the internet right now.
Not that this makes it more valid. God knows if I tried all the things the internet made popular I'd be in jail for breading my cats to death.
But for this particular crying hack, there's science to back up the claims of its efficacy.
Because crying is a passive and involuntary act, the muscular tension we create when we concentrate on pinching that skin between our fingers acts as a distraction for our muscles in addition to being another task to distract us from whatever has brought on our tears.
It's intensely frustrating to be in the middle of a heated debate and to feel the tears coming. It's frustrating for you because it's not something you're doing on purpose, and it's frustrating for the other person because it can feel like a tactic of manipulation even when it isn't.
I'm a feminist which means that I believe men and women should be treated equally. It kind of undercuts my beliefs to then start bawling in an argument and immediately earn undue sympathy for my cause.
So if there's some magical trick I can do to instantly stop tears that won't be helpful, I'm willing to try it.
And I'm definitely filing this little tip away the next time some asshole thinks he can elbow me in the boob on the subway train and NOT say he's sorry. It'll nice to be able to put the fear of god into someone instead of just make them pity me.