Your Handy Mad Libs Guide To Take On Phone Sex Like A BOSS

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Your Handy Mad Libs Guide To Take On Phone Sex Like A BOSS
Sex

[Insert dirty adjective here.]

We're hopping in a sexual time machine, and heading to a period when phones were for talking—not texting or FaceTiming or eggplant emojis. Oh yeah, we're about to phone sex it up.

Since most of us have never attempted old-school phone sex, at least not in the last decade, we've created a simple, scandy script (with the help of relationship expert Jane Greer, Ph.D., for a hot-and-bothered convo—but there's a hilarious catch: It's Mad Libs style.

Let’s get it on:

I'm getting so excited just thinking about you right now and what you're__(-ing verb)__.
 
Can you undo one of your__(noun)__? Can you feel me __(-ing verb)__at you? Are you starting to get __(adjective)__ and __(adjective)__?
 
I'm feeling so __(adjective)__, are you feeling __(adjective)__ and__(adjective)__?

Tell me what you'd like me to do if I was there.

Where do you want me to __(verb)__ you?

Do you want it __(adjective)__ and __(adjective)__ or __(adjective)__ ,__(adjective)__ , and __(adjective)__ ?
 
Where do you want me to put my __(noun)__? Have you been naughty and need some __(noun)__ licking?
 
Where do you want me to start __(-ing verb )__ you: __(noun)__ to__(noun)__ or from the __(noun)__ up?
 
I can feel your __(noun)__ on my __(noun)__. I want you to __(verb)__me to a __(noun)__ song.
 
Let me put my __(noun)__ in your pants. Does it feel like _(adjective)____?
 
My __(noun)__ feels like it's going to __(verb)__, are you with me? Are we going to __(verb)__ together?
 
Wow, you really know how to __(verb)__. I'll be thinking about how you__(verb)__ my __(noun)__ until I see you again.

This article was originally published at Women's Health. Reprinted with permission from the author.

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