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Huh.
By Christine Schoenwald — Written on Dec 06, 2021
Ever since I can remember, I've been a bit of a Francophile. I've always loved French films, and I've seen quite a lot of them. One of my dear friends lives in Paris, so I've been able to visit the city a number of times.
We often go to the movies — or as they say, the cinema. I also attend French film festivals, watch French movies on Netflix, and even own a few of my favorite French films, such as Amelie.
If you're familiar with French movies, you'll notice that a theme of infidelity often seems to run throughout many of them. Why is this? Well, it's due to the fact that the French don't view having affairs as a big deal.
It's assumed that men (and on occasion, women) will reach a certain age and take a mistress or a young lover. If you watch enough of these movies, you will get the sense that affairs are actually a natural part of French relationships.
The French have long had the reputation (and rightly so) of not being faithful to their partners. A 2014 study conducted by the French Institute of Public Opinion found that the vast majority of French men — 55 percent — and nearly one-third of French women (32 percent) admitted to cheating on their significant others. Mon dieu!
In Aziz Ansari's 2015 book, Modern Romance, he references this research. He talks about traveling to France to better understand the country's unique views on infidelity, affairs, and love.
Ansari discovered that it wasn't that French people had an entirely modern take on marriage values and didn't care if their partner cheated; it's just that the French are actually much more forgiving of when their partners strayed.
When Ansari interviewed young men in France about cheating, they even called it "natural" and "inevitable" to do so. One even said, "In the subconscious of French people is an idea that everyone cheats."
And it's not just men who feel this way. Women do, too. One woman even told Ansari that being faithful to just one person forever didn't seem possible.
In fact, having an affair is supposedly so common in France that someone told Ansari that their flower shops often use the advertisement, "don't forget your mistress!"
In other words, because of their cultural attitude, French people and their relationships aren't shattered by a betrayal. About 63 percent of French people believe they can still love someone, even if he or she has cheated on them.
Being able to forgive is a big part of love, after all.
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Christine Schoenwald is a writer, performer, and astrology lover. She has written over 500 articles on the zodiac signs and how the stars influence us. She's had articles in The Los Angeles Times, Salon, and Woman's Day. Visit her website or and her Instagram.