In our recent Break Up With Your Ex survey, we found out that 50 percent of you have one or more problematic ex attachments — yet 52 percent are ready to move on completely. Sound familiar?
You want to get over him, but no matter how hard you try, you can't. You're stuck. And in the digital age, with so many ways to stay connected, from Facebook to Gchat, you're constantly being reminded of that one person you're trying to forget.
And while you may think it's easier to keep in touch through a text or a "like" here and there, it's so crucial for you to cut ties, and that's why for the next two weeks, we're here to help you make a clean break from your ex, once and for all.
Why do we have so much trouble letting go?
You haven't checked his Facebook page for weeks, set up an online dating profile and flirted with the cute guy at the bar for hours. So why are you still thinking of him?
No matter how much you want to get over your former boyfriend, you know it doesn't happen overnight. The thing is, half of respondents believed that exes can't truly be friends. So why are we even wasting our time?
Well, 53 percent of you say you're holding on to your ex because of nostalgia and longing. But, it also has to do with the way you're thinking — that how you'll feeling about the situation says something about you as a person.
YourTango expert, relationship coach and author of bestseller Goodbye Mr. Ex, Marina Pearson explains, "when the person has wrapped up their self-worth around their relationship, it will be harder for them to let go because they think that their relationship said something about who they were in the moment."
The perks of breaking up with your ex.
Unfriending your ex online — and offline — is liberating. Pearson says a big misconception about cutting ties with your ex is that time is a healer. "It doesn't have to be a long drawn out process, especially if they work together with someone to accelerate this process, which would be advisable if you want to move on NOW." And the benefits of moving on as soon as possible? Well, there are some pretty good ones.
1. You get to stop feeling upset, lost and confused.
2. You get to reclaim back your power and your inner mojo.
3. You get to open the space to love again.
The good news is that it can be easy.
So what's one thing you can do today, heck right now, to get over him? "The only easy measure there ever is when it comes down to breaking up with someone is to "think" that it's an easy process," says Pearson, "the only time it ever becomes difficult is when we get caught up in the reality that it's going to be hard and that the outcome is going to be messy."
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