As a guy, it's a thought that's probably crept into your mind at least once: Is she faking it? Ladies can be phenomenal fakers (I mean, you've seen that scene in When Harry Met Sally, and then hopefully this recent reenactment) and they can translate a "dude, time to wrap it up" signal into a convincing moan.
Just consider it one of their better between-the-sheets skills. But are either sexes benefiting from a false finish? And who are the biggest fakers of all? There's a lot of curiosity surrounding the topic and several studies have illuminated some remarkable facts as researchers look to getting to the bottom of faking the big "O".
1. This Group Is Faking It The Most ...
Your mind automatically goes to women, right? Well surprisingly, that's not necessarily true. According to one study, two-thirds of divorced men are the biggest fakers. The study, conducted by DatingAdvice.com, involved 1,080 men to determine the effects of divorce on libido. Researchers found that the guys were faking the big "O" because they were scared of the emotional intimacy. Climaxing in front of someone is about letting someone see you in your most vulnerable state. For these guys, it's a defense mechanism.
2. More Women Than You Think Fake It — A Lot More
It goes without saying that most women have done it at least once … but 80 percent? Hate to break it to you fellas, but after polling a team of over 70 women between the ages of 18 and 48, team of British researchers found that a whopping 80 percent faked orgasms during vaginal intercourse at least half of the time. Additionally, 25 percent of women are "oohing and ahhing" 90 percent of the time regardless of whether they climax or not. Might be time to step up your game, guys.
3. Fakers "Oohh And Ahh" To Avoid Hurting Your Feelings
So we know that a lot of women are doing it … but why are they doing it? The same aforementioned study suggests that when she feels that you're getting close to climax, she gets more vocal to "help you cross the finish line" so to speak. So she's trying to be nice and trying to give you an ego-boost. But don't let it go to your head — it was still fake, after all.
4. Fakers Have A Fear Of Intimacy
Guys aren't the only ones using the big "O" as a defense against intimacy. In another study, women were found to be faking orgasms who had an inherent anxiety about intimacy. These researchers say that faking an orgasm — which is really like faking the height of your intimacy — is our means of keeping our partner at a distance.
5. Women Fake It To Get You To Commit
But there's a deeper, more biological motivation behind women faking it, and it has to do with keeping you close and committed to them. For a study published in Archives of Sexual Behavior, researchers surveyed 453 heterosexual women who were in long-term relationships and affirmed the theory that "faking it" is actually an evolutionary adaptation. According to evolutionary theory, a woman's orgasm causes her body to retain sperm for child-bearing. The implication here is that a woman faking an orgasm unconsciously sends a commitment signal to her partner in the hopes of keeping him from straying. So you might say that females are biologically wired to be "fakers."
6. Faking It Might Be A Sign She's Cheating
But ironically, a study claims that women who fake orgasms are more likely to cheat on their partner. Researchers found that both men and women who faked orgasms were far more likely to be unfaithful. So if your partner is consistently faking it, it could be a red flag.
7. But Listen, Faking It Is Not Always A Bad Thing!
Faking isn't always a bad sign for your sex life. Depending on the "faker's" motivation, pretending to orgasm can actually increase their sexual satisfaction, says Erin B. Cooper, a clinical psychology doctoral student at Temple University. He surveyed 366 women between the ages of 18 to 32 who openly admitted to faking orgasms to ask why they did it. Simply put, some people just fake it 'til they make it.
You may think you're not doing any major damage by simply sitting in a chair all day at work, but spending too much time in a chair can shorten the muscles of the pelvic floor. What this means, in regards to orgasms, is that the tightness of these muscles can stand in the way of climaxing. You should always make it a point to get up and do stretches throughout the day.