Are You Financially Cheating On Your Spouse?

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Financial Infidelity: Are You Cheating On Your Spouse?
One study claims 58 percent of spouses hide money from their partners.

Written by Adrian Nazari for Credit Sesame.

Bring up the word "infidelity" at a dinner party or on a psychiatrist's couch, and you're likely to see the conversation veer off to issues regarding libido. But there's another form of infidelity that is proving to be just as damaging to relationships: financial infidelity.

 

Up until the Great Recession of 2008, the data on financial infidelity was both sparse and inconclusive. But as economic conditions increasingly began to weigh on the financial stability of U.S. households, researchers are finding that financial infidelity is now trumping sexual infidelity as the largest threat to stable relationships.

A recent survey, co-published by Today.com and Self Magazine, takes a closer look and illustrates the severity of financial infidelity and it's impact on relationships.

The study builds on previous work on the subject by the National Endowment for Financial Education, which claims 58% of spouses hide money from their partners, and the National Foundation for Credit Counseling, which says one in four spouses wouldn't tell their partners about "financial difficulties."

While both studies are worthy of additional review, the Today/SELF survey is especially enlightening, shining a harsh light on the lengths that some partners will go to hide financially destructive behaviors from their spouses.

Today/SELF polled 23,000 online adults, and found that most respondents (60%) view financial infidelity as harshly as sexual infidelity, with one-third linking the two, saying that lying about money, ultimately leads to lying about sex.

Researchers also found that almost half of all survey respondents (46%) have lied to their spouses or partners about money at one time or another. These financial fibs included hiding purchases, lying about money spent, and hiding cash withdrawals from joint banking and investment accounts in what the survey calls a "clandestine" fashion.

Money Secrets: Men vs. Women

According to the study, almost twice as many women as men hid purchases from their partner, while over a third said they keep "money secrets" from their loved ones due to conflicting attitudes on the three cornerstones of family finances — money, credit and debt.

"Discussing money can be very awkward, but it is important to have this conversation with your partner early on," notes SELF Editor-in-Chief, Lucy Danziger. "To have a successful relationship, you need to have trust and hiding money secrets is a huge way to break that confidence. Open up about past debts, then lay some ground rules for the future and have a mutual agreement on your expenses. This openness will save you from many fights in the end and lead to a much healthier relationship." Keep reading...

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