Florida's John and Jane Doe tried to identity fraud their way into new iPhones.
As the old saying goes, the couple that cons together gets in on(s) together. While we romanticize couples like Bonnie and Clyde, Andy and Lea Fastow and, of course, Lucille and Oscar Bluth, there is something incredibly romantic about a me-and-you-against-the-world scenario even if you're not lovesick teens. As Tupac once sang, "all I need in this life of sin is me and my girlfriend."* But, eventually, the good times almost always end in a hail of hot lead or stinging slap of a pair of steel handcuffs.
That being said, a couple of grifters were picked up near Altamonte Springs, FL (northwest of Orlando) trying to fraudulently purchase iPhone 5s. Ho hum. However, this couple refused to produce proven identification when the police arrived. Instead, it was discovered that the two had upwards of 20 falsified IDs, per ActionNewsJax. The couple also had credit cards to match the falsified driver's licenses. Eventually, you'd guess, that their true identities will be divined, otherwise John and Jane Doe will go to the pokey as such.
What can we take from this? While their vocation is crooked-er than the question marks that are their names, this sort of loyalty is sort of nice to see. They had a plan and stuck to the contingency. Maybe her sister's common law husband was making a mint stripping copper wiring from construction sites and scrambling if Johnny law were to arrive but John and Jane stuck with identity theft and keeping their mouths shut when caught.
I'm no expert on Florida fraud laws but I'm guessing that even if the police don't ascertain their identities, they'll still have to do a stretch in the joint. However, this kind of stick-to-it-iveness could really pay off in their future life free of crime. Unless one coerced the other into this caper. In which case, roll over on him (or her!) and move to a state less synonymous with criminal hijinks.
Finally, how much do any of us REALLY know about our partners? I mean aren't we all waving around fake IDs? Feel me?
*Note: Some allege that Tupac is referring to his gun with the term "girlfriend" making his death in a barrage of Las Vegas bullets all the more predictable.
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