I was going to do Part 2 of this story in the form of an interview but I couldn't get through it. Things got very heated and ended in a yelling match. So here is what happened and the back story on the "The Married Cheater."
He cheated first, she found out...I guess he told her. She decided to deal with it and they went on with life as a married couple. About 3 years later, he was diagnosed with a potentially deadly disease. It was touch and go for almost a year and not long after he was given a clean bill of health (a week after to be exact) SHE DROPPED A BOMB ON HIM! She had met someone else.
Not only had she been seeing this man, while her husband was on his death-bed but she professed her love for this new guy and wanted to be with him. That confession was a slap in the face to him and hurt him to his core. It wasn't just the fact that she cheated because he expected it would happen one day because he had cheated on her. It wasn't even the fact that she was cheating when he could have died. What REALLY hurt him was the fact that she, his wife, was in love with another man.
"The Married Cheater" decided that maybe she just needed to get this out of her system. "We had been married for 10+ years and I had cheated on her," he tried to rationalize to himself. So, he sat back for 2 months to allow her to be with this man and get it out of her system and then they could go back to "life as usual"...so he thought.
He tried not to show his hurt when she would not come home, leaving the responsibility of taking care of their children completely to him. He walked into his room (they no longer share a room) to avoid seeing her getting ready to see her lover. He felt like it was "karma" and he deserved what was happening but he NEVER thought that the affair was as serious as it was until he read through some text messages between his wife and her lover that expressed how much she loved this man and wanted to be with him. "She had NEVER expressed her love for me, the way that she expressed it for this other man in those texts."
After 2 months, he couldn't take it anymore and her sat her down and they had a talk. He wanted her to make a decision and she told him that she wanted to be with the other man. She wasn't happy in the marriage anymore and she didn't want to be in it. He begged her to stay and wanted to work it out but she didn't want to.
After that conversation, he began to see several women in an effort to "get back at his wife."
My question to him was, "When you initially decided to cheat, why not decide to leave. If you wanted to throw 10+ years of marriage away on a piece of ass...why not just leave? Why fuck around?"
"You don't know what goes on in a marriage. Sometimes situations and stuff happens."
"If that is the case and you are not willing to try to work it out, then LEAVE! That's the damn problem, men want their cake and eat it, too!" I yelled.
"Do you think that I went into the marriage intending to cheat," he asked.
"YOU are the one that said, 'ALL men cheat,' so if that was always your philosophy then you KNEW that when you got married!"
"I didn't KNOW that when I got married. I didn't get married thinking that I would cheat!"
"So, you were lying when you said that all men cheat because by your own statement, you said that all men do and that would mean that you knew that you would one day cheat!"
"Look, YOU get married and think a MF will be faithful!