Polyamorous: Could An Open Relationship Be Right For You?


Is an open relationship right for you?
Ask yourself these questions to determine whether you should try a no-strings-attached arrangement.

I have never felt completely comfortable in monogamous relationships. Yet, I wonder whether or not I could actually have a relationship with more than one person. After reading this story on xoJane, "I'm In A Happy Polyamorous Relationship," I have to say, uncommitted love seems pretty darn appealing...But, where to begin? And, would it be right for me? I spoke to marriage and family therapy counselor Moushumi Ghose as well as a Olivia Senecal, my dear friend who has been in a committed polyamorous relationship for the last five years. The two helped me come up with five questions anyone should ask themselves to determine whether or not they should try polyamory. Could it be for you? Read on.

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1. What do you want your polyamorous relationship to look like?

Ghose says that "there are all kinds and combinations of polyamorous relationships," and "many labels for such things," so she herself prefers "to not use the labels, as sexuality and relationships are best when seen as fluid, and ever-changing." This is one of the appealing things about polyamorous relationships for many people (including myself); they're less rigid in guidelines and expectations than monogamous ones can often be.

Senecal says that it’s incredibly important to figure out, beforehand, what your ideal relationship would be. "How will casual dating be managed? Sexual safety? What happens when you fall in love and want to have more than one committed partner?" These details may change and evolve as time goes on, but it's necessary to have at least some specifications and ideas on what you want. Keep reading...

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