6 Lessons From Jennifer Lopez And Marc Anthony's Divorce

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6 Lessons From Jennifer Lopez And Marc Anthony's Divorce
Looking at the six love lessons to take away from Marc Anthony and JLo's marriage and divorce.

You would think that after a while, there wouldn't be anything more we could learn from a celebrity divorce. But it's not true. I think we can always learn something from a broken marriage, if only so we don't repeat their mistakes.

1. Know that the seven year mark is a difficult time. Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony were married seven years. Experts say that the 7 to 10 year mark is the time when many people start to think about jumping out of marriages. This was true in my own marriage. About 7 years in, I began searching for what could make my marriage better, thankfully, instead of deciding to give up. I decided to improve what we had. Know that these periods of time are going to come, and they are also going to pass. If you keep working on your marriage, and not looking for ways to eject from it, you will come out better on the other side. Jennifer Lopez And Marc Anthony: A Relationship Timeline

2. A marriage isn't a business deal. I don't know all the details of the Marc Anthony and Jennifer Lopez marriage, and I don't want to be too judgmental. But I do know that they are both very business savvy and make lots of money doing what they do. In reading about their split, I was reminded that there is always more than money at stake and "who gets what" when a marriage breaks up. Something does happen to the children. Even if the breakup is amicable, there will always be emotional scars. Talk to kids whose parents have been divorced. Even if the breakup was cordial, most will tell you that they wish it wouldn't have happened. The Marriage Secret No One Ever Tells You

3. Jealousy can cause problems. In the days following the divorce announcement, there were some reports that Marc was jealous of Jennifer's "sex symbol" status. I can't comment on the truth of that statement, but I do know that if you are jealous of your spouse's success, it will cause problems. If the spouse who isn't as "successful" (or is feeling less than "successful") begins thinking that the marriage is a competition there will be resentment and jealousy. When that happens, it's time to take a renewed look at your marriage vows. Remember when you took them, you became one person. Are You The Jealous Type?

Couples need to embrace the reality of being "one"—a team, a partnership, a place where, if one is weak, the other is strong. If you embrace your spouse's success and pick up the slack, instead of getting jealous, life will be better. A practical example is if my wife has to work outside the home, I need to pick up some of the household management duties and ease her burden, instead of being jealous that she gets to skip out of housework.

4. If your husband does pick up the slack, don't stomp on his efforts. This is a further thought on the previous point. If hubby does step up to the plate to ease the burden, be grateful that he has tried to compensate. Keep from being angry because his methods of folding clothes, taking out the trash and vacumming the house don't look exactly like yours. Husbands want wives who appreciate and love them for who they are and what they do, not someone who gets upset when we don't live up to a different set of expectations.

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