Every relationship comes to a crossroads when both people have to decide what type of commitment they want, if at all. Some of us have clear rules and don't waste time playing around any longer than three months; while, others hang on for years. But, there is no need to squander precious time with someone who isn't ready to step up.
If you're beyond "buddy" or "boo" status and ready for something steady, it's time to start weeding out the boys (who may be nice) but just aren't ready to grow up. Don't know the signs? Here are a few to get you moving:
1. He's still in school…getting his third Bachelor's degree.
Not a Master's, not a Doctorate, not a Ph.D.—a third Bachelor's degree. It's wonderful that he is educated, but he doesn't have a clear vision. Many of us figure out who and want it is we want to be during those first four years and progress toward our professional goals thereafter. A man who is unsure of who he is and where he would like to go is not prepared to make long-term commitments. He may be bright but he needs more time to define his vision.
2. He still heads to Cancun for Spring Break.
Remember the 20 year-old guy that would come to your high school parties? This guy is no different. When college ends so does the pseudo-adulthood debauchery that goes with it. Guys who feel the need to rehash their younger years are simply avoiding the maturity expected with age. Nothing wrong with being the life of the party so long as it's not a foam party…full of underage co-eds. Madame Noire: Five Things You Should Never Say To A Single Woman
3. He's unemployed by choice.
Yes, the recession has left many jobless; but, there are some who also haven't been looking very hard. Whether he's living on student loans or mooching off Mom, an able-bodied, unemployed man is a sign of pure laziness. If you're in the market for marriage-material, you need someone resourceful and ready to hustle (legally).