You know your man isn't ready to grow up if he follows Lil' Wayne on Twitter.
Every relationship comes to a crossroads when both people have to decide what type of commitment they want, if at all. Some of us have clear rules and don't waste time playing around any longer than three months; while, others hang on for years. But, there is no need to squander precious time with someone who isn't ready to step up.
If you're beyond "buddy" or "boo" status and ready for something steady, it's time to start weeding out the boys (who may be nice) but just aren't ready to grow up. Don't know the signs? Here are a few to get you moving:
1. He's still in school…getting his third Bachelor's degree.
Not a Master's, not a Doctorate, not a Ph.D.—a third Bachelor's degree. It's wonderful that he is educated, but he doesn't have a clear vision. Many of us figure out who and want it is we want to be during those first four years and progress toward our professional goals thereafter. A man who is unsure of who he is and where he would like to go is not prepared to make long-term commitments. He may be bright but he needs more time to define his vision.
2. He still heads to Cancun for Spring Break.
Remember the 20 year-old guy that would come to your high school parties? This guy is no different. When college ends so does the pseudo-adulthood debauchery that goes with it. Guys who feel the need to rehash their younger years are simply avoiding the maturity expected with age. Nothing wrong with being the life of the party so long as it's not a foam party…full of underage co-eds. Madame Noire: Five Things You Should Never Say To A Single Woman
3. He's unemployed by choice.
Yes, the recession has left many jobless; but, there are some who also haven't been looking very hard. Whether he's living on student loans or mooching off Mom, an able-bodied, unemployed man is a sign of pure laziness. If you're in the market for marriage-material, you need someone resourceful and ready to hustle (legally).
4. He's over 25 and lives at home with his parents.
There is a level of independence a mature man has that won't allow him to live with his parents except in the case of dire (and I mean lost his job, house burned down) circumstances. The guy who contently lives at home isn't ready to do what's necessary to leave the nest. If he can't (or won't) provide the basics for himself, surely he can't do much for you. Think Baby Boy. He may be cute and nice, but babies and STDs are the only thing you can count on from Jody-types. Madame Noire: The Nice Guy: Is He Really Losing?
5. He follows Lil' Wayne on Twitter.
Read more signs he's not ready to grow up on Madame Noire: 8 Signs Your Man Isn't Ready To Grow Up
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