The Ten Best V-Day Presents For Him (For You)

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The Ten Best V-Day Presents For Him (For You)
Valentine's Day is an opportunity to sex up your man and iron out the kinks in your relationship.

Katy Perry is rumored to be buying Russell Brand a lilac colored Bentley this Valentine’s Day. But that doesn’t mean that you have to break the bank to let your guy know how much he makes your heart palpitate.

My most direct advice is this: Make sure the gift has meaning for both of you – that it reminds him of the connection you have. And even better, make it something that you both benefit from. After all, Valentine’s Day is all about keeping the lust flowing for the next year. Here are my top 10 gifts for him (for you):

  • A lap-dancing class. Tell him that for his present you have enrolled in a lap-dancing class, so you can give him a private show along with a knee trembler dessert and liqueur back at your place. This is sure to make a memorable present for both of you. The New York School of Burlesque (http://www.schoolofburlesque.com) has lap-dancing classes for a mere $30, and you’re sure to find deals in your own state. Otherwise, a pole dancing or strip class may well suffice in the sparks-raising stakes.
  • A gym membership. If you beau has started to take the shape of a baby walrus, then V-Day is the perfect time to nudge him toward a new workout routine. Just do it in a nice way. Explain that you knew he was looking forward to getting fit again -- and don’t tell him you think his love handles are becoming love hangars.
  • A man’s apron. (And if you can afford it, a small grill.) This will encourage him to start cooking for you in the next year, especially when you tell him how a sizzling steak and salad will get your sex drive sizzling too. And there is nothing sexier than a man in an apron.
  • Sexy cologne. Are you so tired of him dousing on the Brut 33 that you’d rather smell rotting vegetables? Then buy him a new scent that gets you more aroused. And show him how to put it on so you can’t smell it from a ZIP code away.
  • A wine appreciation course. If your man’s wine selections have the bouquet of battery acid, then turn him into a connoisseur of the grape with a wine appreciation course. Beyond picking more quaffable wines, it will be sexy hearing him speak with a little knowledge rather than just asking for a bottle of plonk.
  • Sexy underwear. Replace his ancient underwear and other fashion contraceptives with some gorgeous boxer shorts – and let him know how hot they make you when he tries them on. If you reward him for wearing sexy skivvies, you’ll reinforce his new wardrobe habit.
  • Nice shoes. Every woman knows that a man’s shoes say a lot about his sex appeal. Filthy sneakers with an entourage of flies don’t spell longevity in the libido department, and neither do open-toed sandals with socks. Get him a nice pair of leather shoes or flip-flops that don’t make you want to throw up when you look at them.
  • A copy of the Kama Sutra. If your guy’s boring in bed, or you find yourself drifting while he heaves away on top of you, pony up a copy of Kama Sutra, and give yourself a new position every week. Add in some lovely lingerie for you to help get the sparks flying.

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