2 Ways to Re-ignite a Relationship

When you first started dating, everyday felt like the 4th of July.  You knew who (what) you were going to see, but every day (year) came with an inevitable surprise and an opportunity to just relax.  Nowdays, relaxation might be a little harder to come by.  Today, the last time you really relaxed might be physically fighting with the last time your husband surprised you with a new move in bed.  You know, since the last one just had her second birthday party and the other one will be turning five.  (Uh...your kids.)

The simple, yet not so simple, way to relax and share new experiences together would to just take a vacation.  Like when people suggest that everyone should "just talk" to their partner about relationship problems, I say that it is easier said than done.  Here are some suggestions to try at home (or close by) that could help bring you and your partner closer when you feel like you've grown distant:

Step Outside

The next time you want to tell your man to go take a hike, you might wanna change that phrase to, "Hey, let's go take a hike together."  There's something about simply walking and talking that opens up both light conversation and mild discussion.  When I dated my husband, we used to walk his nieces to the park to play and head out to the mountians on the spur of the moment.  When nobody is watching, it's easier to say what's on your mind and you have the physical action of walking to keep your nerves at ease.  As oppposed to a long car trip or packed airport, it really sets you up (with healthier space and time contraints) for more time bonding and less time to bicker.  Wherever you choose to take a long walk to, I think that most people would agree that nature has a way of just relaxing things.

Party Together

No, not the babyshowers, not the three hour kid parties.  We all have these parties to go to and it's fun to chat and see our children play games.  In my experience, the "day-time" parties actually create tension half of the time.  You're either late, not prepared or missing something.  But, on to the brighter side:

Gather up music that you know puts you in a good mood and don't forget to throw in a few of his favorites.  After all the day's basic events have passed, make a party for just the two of you.  Fix up food and drinks more like a party and less like romantic dinner.  I mean, we've already heard about the candles and lobster dinner plus whipped cream cliche.  I'm not talking about that.  I mean, set out the beer, hard cider or cheap sugary wines that you can down in three glasses.  Use a little nostalgic music and food to bring you back to when you couldn't wait to see him again.  In this situation, even playing hard to get could be part of reviving the sense of seduction between you.  Dance, just talk or both.  Either way, you might just start liking him again.  Well, we'll see...