Last Friday, Kate Major talked with the CBS Early Show about her affair with Jon Gosselin, the real reason why she quit her job at Star magazine a few days into their affair, and the fact that the father of eight inevitably got back together with Hailey Glassman.
Clearly devastated by the situation, the second Kate insisted that she was not a dummy for getting involved with a D-lister with an estranged wife, 22-year-old girlfriend, and several children. Rather, she described herself as something of a victim.
Of course, we'd love to be able to reassure her that she's right. But in fact, we can't. After all, any woman who knowingly chooses to be the other woman is not a victim, and that's the first thing she should know before taking that path. Read on for more about this, and four other rules for women who choose to be the other.
1. Don't define yourself as a victim. Victims do not have power over their situations. Victims do not knowingly inflict pain on others. Victims are children who are ignored and women who are cheated on and a lot of other things. But if you are the other woman (ahem, yes you, Kate Major), you are not a victim.
2. Don't believe his promises. Kate Major said that Jon Gosselin promised to hire her as a personal assistant. She said that that was the real reason why she quit her job as a reporter at Star magazine. Of course, after she quit her job, he quit her. The lesson: don't believe a man who is dishonest enough to cheat on his primary partner. If he's lying to her, he's probably lying to you, too.
3. Don't derail your life for him. If you're the other woman, you should not plan your life around the two-timing man you're involved with. You should not, as Kate Major did, quit your job. You should not relocate. And you should not give up the other things in your life that are important to you. After all, he wouldn't.
4. Don't expect him to derail his life for you. Kate Major thought that Jon Gosselin would leave Hailey Glassman and start a new life with her. She thought they would have a happy life that involved romance and work and possibly (we presume) a bit of d-list fame. But she should have known better. There are very few advantages to a man leaving his secure life for someone who's proven herself to have questionable morals.
5. Don't announce your affair to the world. Really, if you want to maintain some level of respect in the public eye (or, in the very least, in eyes of your friends and family and colleagues), you will not sully your name or someone else's just because you're behaving badly. And no, you will not grant interviews to national news outlets to discuss the affair, either.