Will The Government Make You Take His Last Name?
Married name or maiden name: your choice, not the government's says one naming expert.
Seventy percent of Americans think it's beneficial for women to take her husband's last name when they marry, while half say the government should require women to change their names when they marry, according to a new survey by researchers from Indiana University and the University of Utah. Responses were immediate. The Great Name Debate
"What women's lib?" asked a headline in the New York Daily News. "Taking away choice from something so wholly personal is quite another—and is one of those awful things that, like Michael Jackson's death, is initially shocking—and then, after a moment's depressed reflection, not at all," wrote Jezebel.com.
But it's dangerous to buy these headlines hook, line, and sinker because survey results like these are almost always more complicated than they seem. So before you schedule your move to Canada, let's get one thing straight: Academic research on the topic of married names is limited, but it points to increasing use of and positive perceptions of nontraditional last names, NOT to scary scenarios like government mandated married names.
As a family naming consultant with a degree in psychology, I spent two years researching trends and attitudes about nontraditional last names. The Name Survey included data from 1000 respondents and—although not intended to be academic—I found attitudes about nontraditional last names to be overwhelmingly positive. In my survey, three out of four people thought using something besides just a man's last name was a good idea.
A 2002 study conducted by researchers at Millikin University indicates that married men and women with hyphenated last names were perceived differently than other people—women with a hyphenated last name were perceived as more friendly, industrious and intellectually curious, while men with hyphenated last names were seem as accommodating, good-natured and committed to his marriage. A 2004 Harvard University study found that the number of college-educated women who kept their surnames upon marriage rose from about 3 percent in 1975 to nearly 20 percent in 2001. My 2006 Name Survey—which admittedly consisted of mostly college-educated Caucasian females—found as many as 25 percent of married women choosing something other than their husband's last name. Married or Maiden Name: How To Choose
Discussion
I struggle with the whole name thing. My guy sounded upset when I told him that I couldn't imagine having a different last name than the one I was born with, it seems to work so well and is a large part of my identity (besides, I don't want to sprot the same name as his ex-wife). I also feel strongly about it because there are no males in my branch of the family to continue our family name now. Even my daughter sports my last name, a move that upset her dad-doner and his family, but he didn't marry me and I'm her primary caretaker. I see this all as a personal issue that will change from person to person and family to family, but it's not the name who makes people who they are so it shouldn't matter.
Is this even an issue? In my state, it's a pain for a woman to take her husband's last name. There's a lot of red tape associated with it. My wife kept her last name and there were no questions asked about it.
