Can Men and Women Reall Be Friends?

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Can Men and Women Reall Be Friends?

As a woman, you have many men in your life. Some you may consider "friends." Like actual friends. You have a friendship with them as in, you don't want to sleep with them or there is something that is keeping you from being able to sleep with them (such as their sexual preference or perhaps a wife or steady girlfriend.) It is different from high school or college where you can actually have a guy friend who is just a friend or study buddy. Every situation is different, and of course there are always exceptions.
All I can say is what my experience has been. When I was married, I had many guy friends. They were friends. When I got divorced, suddenly things changed; I felt like a wounded gazelle surrounded by lions. I had to eliminate some of my "guy" friends once I settled on my new man (who actually was the first to pounce.) The reason being was that I tore down the barriers to my availability (marriage) and ended up hurting my "friends" when I still just wanted to be friends with them. I did not lead these men on, but I think that maybe friendship had a different meaning for them.
So I had to make a set of rules for any kind of friendship I have with men. First off I can only be friends with a man if he is in a relationship. Secondly, I can only be his friend if I am also friends with his wife or girlfriend. That way, no one will be misconstruing the friendship or think that it is something that it isn't.
I remember being so annoyed when I watched When Harry Met Sally and the part where Harry (Billy Crystal) told Sally (Meg Ryan) his philosophy on men and women being friends because I totally disagreed. Now, I think I am siding with Harry. He said "Because no man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He always wants to have sex with her." But of course, he also said that it doesn't matter if he finds her attractive or not because he said that he would "pretty much want to nail 'em too"
Does any heterosexual woman have a male friend who is not gay, not in a relationship and not harboring lustful feelings for her? My guess would be no.

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