Well I decided to write this to say thank you to those who took time out of their busy lives to read my question and give me advice in regards to my problem. I've read and re-read everyones suggestions and I'm going to just try to live my life for me from now on and not anyone else. Not going to be easy but I will try to take it day by day.
"It's hard having kids because it's boring," Louis C.K. explains. "It's just being with them on the floor while they're being children. They read Clifford The Big Red Dog to you at a rate of 50 minutes a page, and you have to sit there and be horribly proud and bored at the same time."