Stale Sex? 6 Secrets From A Supersexpert
All about sex toys, threesomes, and other ways to improve your love life.
Is your sex life in a rut? Do you want to try out something new, but are unsure of how to go about doing so? Author Tracey Cox explains everything you need to know in her book, Secrets of A Supersexpert, from sex tips, miscellaneous trivia, and the psychology of falling in love.Forum: Sex Tips that work
For instance, two in every thousand men can perform oral sex on themselves, women have the highest libido during days 12-16 of their cycle, and having more sex pretty much guarantees less erection problems. Just a few things to bring up at your next office function...
Tracey also points out, that while being in a long-term relationship can lead to love, often times lust and attraction can fade over time. Which does not always fare well for your sex life.
Here are some ideas to help spice things up, direct from Ms. Cox:
1. Try a threesome. Nevertheless, beware the emotional backfires of having a threesome, and always try to focus on your partner more than the other person.
2. Introduce sex toys to break up your routine. For vibrators, choose a stronger one, as you can always place it on a lower setting. In addition, make sure to store your toys separately and keep them clean.Read: Sex Toys You'll Both Love
Remember, have fun. Today's sex toy market includes toys that pleasure both men and women via vibrating, licking, rotating, and more.
3. Masturbate in front of each other. Besides being an instant turn-on for him, it allows you both to see exactly what makes each other tick. Pay attention to how he masturbates to find out what he likes—stroke by stroke.
4. Location, location, location. Try getting it on somewhere unusual, whether in the car, outside, or just on the bathroom floor. Poll: Where's the Craziest Place You've Had Sex?
5. Get over society's sexual norms and instead focus on what you and your partner enjoy. Compromise with each other. If he wants to watch porn together, but you find it appalling, try watching an adult film made specifically for women.
6. Make sure to communicate with your partner in order to have the best sex life possible, even after years of marriage.
Oh, and no matter the situation, lube never hurts.
Discussion
toys are OK I think but they can't take over. my husband bought one and he is obssessed with using it because it makes his penis larger and he thinks that that is what I like, which I do , sometimes. Sometimes he want s to plunge right in and not make me ready for it and wonders why I don't enjoy it. I get frustrated with the toy and threaten to throw it away because I get so frustrated. He is using it more for his enjoyment than mine. He also likes me to masturbate in front of him with it, again, sometimes I want to, and also alone and then tell him about it afterward. which I don't want to. He trys to get me to use it whether I want to or not and it has become so I don't want sex with it at all and he wants to use it pretty much everytime we have sex. I have told him that I like his penis size, he is perfect size and I have told him so. I have said that the toy is fine, sometimes, but I have to be in the mood and then he has to ready me for it because it is rather large. Sometimes it just hurts. I have expressed this all to him and he is still insistent that the toy is best. Any advice?
Even if my sex life was stale, there is no way I woudl go for a threesome or toys...no thank you! I would rather get creative and experiment with different positions than to go the extreme route...probably even watch a few blue movies, but that's it.
Our sex is very stale,although sometimes it's great when he participates,but most of the time he lays there and wants me to do the work.Boooooring,it would be different if he thrusts back,like last night,he did that and it drove me crazy,if I had more nights like that,I'd be completely satisfied.But,Most of the time,I aggress him and make all the effort,sometimes,I just want him to grab me,throw me down,and take it.I'd be so sprung,damn,I'm getting aroused from the thought,gotta go.
I love my wife, I love making love to my wife. She is however not aggressive at all. She will never, never initiate sex. I love performing oral on her and I so enjoy the responses and the end result, she also gives excellant oral, no complaints there. When we get to the actual penetration she is not active at all. She tends to kind of lay there, seldom moves her hips, will no longer get on top and "ride the pony". She claims it hurts and goes too deep. I tell her that I need her to get aggressive or to initiate the mood but she won't. I pick-up on her signs that she is in the mood, she will come to bed naked if she's ready for "it".
She has actually stated recently, "you are 54 yrs. old, are'nt you supposed to be slowing down sexually?" I want sex just about every night and definately in the morning!! I am 54 yrs old, 6 ft, 240 lbs. but in excellant physical condition. I always considered myself average in the "outfit" department. I've been told by other women that I was "big". (only been married 8 yrs). I don't cheat! I don't want to cheat either but I do have other women make aggressive and sexually suggestive statements to me. I need her to find some initiative to get more aggressive to me.
Any ideas?
I think your wife's vagina may have gotten smaller and drier due to age. She should see a doctor about this. There is no need for it to hurt when you have intercourse.
Other things to try - more stimulation so that her vagina lubricates and gets larger (as women age, this takes longer) or using artificial lubrication (now available at many grocery stores). However, if it's lack of hormones due to menopause, the best solution is to see a doctor.
i wish my mate would be more adventurous when it comes to bed play. I think a woman who speaks her mind is really erotic! It is a huge turn on for the woman to be into trying new things. Anyways you sound really special, I am sure you will be able to work it out
You sound exactly like me in my situation. Sometimes I just want my man to just get rough with me but he just lay there I be like dam can you get with it. LMAO But the sex is so good I
I have the same exact issue. I am starting to believe a lot more women feel the same. I think as women in a relationship we are in control of a lot of different responsibilities. Some we may have chose to take on, others we just got put in that situation. Put all joking aside, I believe they want a man, their man to come home and literally take them. Not rape them but show control, power and strength. Make the female feel totally taken and in control of your every move. Men say they want women to do this and that, and they ask instead of doing. There has to be a degree of respect of course, but knowing each other in a relationshipp it should not be too difficult to determine what your woman will or will not do. Its not really about new things, its the passion behind the intense love making. Dont be scared to spank her, and dont hesitate too, Just do it!!Flip her around like she weighs 90 pnds, manhandle her like you are so into her that you cant get enough, and dont forget to moan a little, I think women like to hear the man turned on. Dirty talk if she is into it, but remember the respect factor.
Sex Toys can bring a fresh wind in a relationship, especially if you are married for a long time.
And trying something new and fun why not, you'll never know until you try. But the suggestions of a threesome, I don't know, if that is such a good idea. It probably depends on who you are and your emotions.
Get over society's sexual norms and instead focus on what you and your partner enjoy
I love that quote from this article. Kayda had is EXACTLY right on! I hae been doing pleasure parties for over 6 years and you end up sort of being like a sex therapist at the parties. We do all of the order taking in a private room one woman at a time and boy, do the inhibitions come down and all of the real sexual dysfunction comes out.
Too many women are worried about what SOCIETY or their partner will think of them if they like to be a little nasty or if they WANT sex too much. Ladies, like Norma says in this article....FOCUS on what you want and what your partner wants and what feels good. Let go of all of that "supposed" to do stuff and go for it. Life is too short. Enjoy your partner, their body, each other and do what feels great.
Of course, I am biased because I sell sex toys so I always think sex toys can help alot, too. But, really it's all about our attitude and our confidence....that is what men and women find sexy is a great attitude and confidence.
