Do I cheat on my Husband with my X-Boyfriend?
I am married but my X-Boyfriend has come back in my life and worst of all he is married with kids and I am married with a kid and we live a couple of blocks away.
I have been married with my husband for almost 15 years now. We are a happily married couple.Our sex life is great. Of course we have our arguments and disagreements, but what couple doesn't right? Well about 6 moths ago I was out with my girlfriend at this bar for her birthday and who do I run into? Daniel my x boyfriend from high school. I had seen him a couple of times before with my husband, but just a quick hi and bye. We gave each other a hug and started talking about old times, when we went out. Besides my husband, Daniel was the only other man that I had a serious relationship with. He told me that he got married and had two boys and I was happy for him. I told him about my life and that I was married with a kid. We talked about where we worked and where we lived and found out that we were practically neighbors. We exchanged e-mails and kept in touch. We e-mailed each other back and forth about family and friends and misc. stuff, but then we started sending each other pictures and flirting on the computer and then playing truth or dare. Well, it got to a point where we decided to meet for the day and hang out like a date. We both arranged to meet and spent the day together. We had lunch and held hands and it felt like we were going out again and at the end he kissed me beneath a tree. It was so romantic it made me forget that I was married for a day and it was only him and I. I knew he felt it as well, but we kept that to ourselves. We continued to chat online and then it got a little steamier. He kept asking me for sexy pics of me so I sent them and the talk got more sexier and we would ask each other what it would be like to have sex. My husband is the only man I have ever had sex with so I have always had that curiousity of being with another man and who better then my ex. I feel comfortable with him becuase of our past. Both of our spouses do not know about our secret relationship and now it's to the point where he wants to have sex with me, but what if we do, is it going to ruin everything? I am afraid that I will like it and want to have an affair with him or worse, what if those feelings get stronger? I don't know what to do. Part of me says do it and finish that chapter in your life, but the other says don't do it because it will hurt your husband and family you love.
Discussion
If you have to ask these questions then there is doubt in your mind which means your worried that something may happen so why take that chance?
Are you willing to throw it all away? It's not just about you. What about his family. His wife. His children?
Are you willing to drag yourself, your husband & your child through a divorce?
And maybe even the same for his family. We already know what he's thinking with. Not his brain!!!
The grass always "looks" greener in the other yard. Is it really? If your so happy with your husband & your sex life is great... why are you even asking yourself these questions?
Ponder it long and hard. Maybe you should start making it more romantic for you & your husband.
Do things to spice it up a little more. Instead of spending time with this guy online sending pictures of yourself. look for ways to make your marriage hotter & more romantic.
Don't risk it all for nothing. Do you love your husband? Think about your wedding vows.
I hope you make the right choice for you & your family! All the best to you!!!!
Let me ask you this? How would you feel if the roles were reversed? Hurt? Betrayed? Loss of trust?
We all have wants and desires and fantasies....that's normal and healthy. When we start acting on those desires outside of the marriage, it's problematic. It's time to take a good, long hard look at your relationship with your husband. You say you love your husband and that you have a sexy health life, so why look outside your marriage for something else? Maybe you should go on a date with your husband....take a walk.....kiss under a tree....send your husband sexy pictures of you, exchange passionate emails. Act out your fantasy with your husband and leave the ex where he belongs.....in the past.
I mean a healthy sex life, not a sexy health life.....I need an edit button....sorry.
Curiousgirl35,
Maybe you and your ex are both trying to rekindle some of your highschool attractions, someone has to be the big person in this relationship, and since you are already having doubts about the sexual part of it I think you should at least break off the relationship with your ex. You have already done somethings with him already if either of your spouses found out would jeopardize your marriages.
Why don't you try and start a conversation with your husband online like you have done your ex, it seem that the excitement is missing in your relationship with your husband, so give him what you are giving your ex.
By all means don't sleep with him, both marriages will be ruined.
and even though he tells you he happy in his marriage what if he not, and looking for a way out you are the way out , I would even stop all the emailing him before it too late.
My 2 cents... the allure of sex with an ex ESPECIALLY since you've only been with one man has to be very enticing. BUT, is it worth losing your marriage to try this out? You're dancing with some pretty risky things here and if you act on this there will be consequences. Guaranteed. And don't fool yourself into believing you won't get caught or feel guilty, you will. So, the question to ask yourself is if you really care about this man (the one from hs), is it worth ending your marrige over? Because your marriage will never be the same if you sleep with this other man. Good or bad.
It will just be forever changed.
Think about that, and if you want to be with this other man, perhaps the issue is not your desire to have sex with more than one person, but that you're not sure of you're marriage is working out.
Keep posting!!!
Well Melanie36, I appreciate your input. I do love my husband very much, but I guess it's the riskiness that I like with my ex. I got excited when he e-mailed me or when we talked on the phone and even hung out. I guess all the years I have been with my husband I felt like it wasn't always like that. Don't get me wrong, I love my husband, he is outgoing, handsome, hard worker, helps me around the house, always compliments me, we have a boy together, but I feel like there is something missing. With my ex I like the conversations we have, he is also handsome, and funny, he gives me good advise, we were always good friends in high school before we went out. Is it possible that I still have feeling for him? Like I said they were the two that I had the most serious relationships with and for a reason I picked my husband. Maybe you are right, maybe there are some issues that my husband and I need to work out before we go any further, maybe my ex is just a distraction from that. I know deep down in my heart, I should not go thru with it. Thanks for your words.
