You may recognize Tilda Swinton as the overreaching corporate attorney in the George Clooney's Michael Clayton. Or you may recognize from her crazy red carpet couture. Or you may recognize her as the titular witch from The Chronicles Of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, And The Wardrobe. On the set of that fantasy spectacular she met a young man named Sandro Kopp who is 29 to her 47. He was a centaur, which is a legendary creature that is half-man and half-horse (bottom half horse, of course). The centaur is sometimes confused with the faun or satyr, which has the bottom half of a goat. So Kopp and Swinton meet. They party down a little and maybe they get a little goofed up on Turkish Delight and fall in love. It doesn’t end there.
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Swinton happens to have twin sons (Xavier and Honor) with a fellow named John Byrne. Byrne is 67 and apparently really, really cool about this sort of thing. On top of that, he’s fabulously wealthy.
Swinton likes to hit the read carpet and travel the world with Kopp but always returns home to Byrne, sometimes with Mr. Kopp in tow. The trio is cagey when asked about their ‘situation.’ And live in a sleepy seaside resort called Nairn, which is probably not accustomed to this ado.
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We’re hoping that this is only the beginning. That they will keep adding partners every 15 years or so to the family. And keep telling everyone that it’s none of their damn business how they run their family. This seems strangely like the plot of One Hundred Years Of Solitude. Somewhere, CS Lewis is punching Aslan in the kidneys for not taking down the White Witch sooner.