Rhona Berens (ACC,CPCC,PhD)
If you're like most parents, you're wondering: WTF happened to my relationship with my spouse?!?! We used to have fun, laugh, act like teammates, and have lots of great sex. Okay, fine, some of us just had good sex, but where did that go? Weren’t kids supposed to bring us closer? We spend so much time taking care of our children, in my case a 6 yo and 2 yo, that when we come up for air, there’s no time left for ourselves, never mind our relationships. We’re unhappy,fighting and disconnected.
I work with parents because someone needs to prioritize our fulfillment and offer a solution for parents to stay sane and stay together. Couple-time and alone-time plummet when we have kids, so finding easy and efficient ways to reconnect isn't just important, it's a survival tactic. Why bother? If you're facing serious relationship challenges, perhaps it's time to move on. But beware: We often drag our baggage with us. Plus, if we're not committed to modeling relationship happiness, how will kids learn how to get through the tough times that plague even the best relationships?
The couples I work with rekindle the love that first brought them together; reignite intimacy; and discover teamwork that makes parenting a joy. Plus, they cultivate healthier relationships with themselves, which is key to every other kinds of relationship satisfaction. Remember that airline safety message about putting the mask on yourself first? It applies just as readily to our relationships with spouses as kids; ultimately, most of us suck at caring for others if we fail to take care of ourselves.
So how can we improve our relationships when parenting takes so much time? By recognizing that improving your relationship is a parenting strategy. Research shows that effective co-parenting and relationship happiness improve our kids’ developmental wellbeing.
Tired of feeling the strain of your relationship and parenting? Ready for relationship fulfillment? Email Rhona@ParentAlliance.com for your FREE individual or couples 30-minute strategy session.
Here are some of my professional details: I'm on the Advisory Board and lead workshops for The Children's Project, a non-profit devoted to helping parents, teachers and communities raise emotionally healthy kids. I'm trained as a Certified Individual Coach by The Coaches Training Institute, as a Relationship Coach by the Center for Right Relationship, and I'm accredited by the International Coach Federation.
The Reason I Became A Helping Professional
I've always loved helping others. As a kid, I lent a supportive ear to friends. Now, I coach parents, and the professionals who support them, e.g., teachers, perinatal professionals, achieve greater fulfillment and learn new tools for positive communication, productive conflict and self-care. While I spend a lot of time with clients helping them improve their relationships with others, I spend as much time helping them improve their relationships with themselves. Funny thing is, the more we improve our relationship with ourselves, the more our relationships with others thrive.
Spiritual, but no affiliation
Over $120 per session