Ten Inconvenient Truths About Love

By

Ten Inconvenient Truths About Love
Read these ten truths about love that no one wants to talk about--see if you agree!

This guest article from Psych Central was written by Leigh Pretnar Cousins, MS

Today I am the Al Gore of romance, compiling a list of ten things which strike me as true, though not pretty, about Love.

 

Is facing them refreshing? Healthy? One of those Hey, look at that elephant in the room! sort of things?

That’s what I’m going for here.

And let’s see if you agree with me, and whether you’ve got some you’d like to add.

  1. Sometimes, when we love someone, we do them more harm than good.
  2. Sometimes, we love more than one person.
  3. It can be really hard to end a relationship, and therefore we often do it in messy, confusing, painful ways.
  4. Sometimes it’s impossible to let go of an old love until you’ve got a new one in its place.
  5. We lie because we want something very badly, that we are convinced we can’t have honestly.
  6. Being evasive, omitting important details, creating distractions, and all those other forms of “spin,” count as lying.
  7. We lie about why we lie. It’s not to protect the other person’s feelings or because “they couldn’t handle the truth.” The real reason is #5, above.
  8. We all lie.
  9. Your lover doesn’t always act in your best interest. Nor do you always act in theirs.
  10. I love you” may mean a great deal to the person having that feeling, but it often doesn’t gets translated into action that connects in a meaningful way to the loved one’s life.  The loved one may not even notice, let alone appreciate, the fact of being loved.

My hope is that we read these and accept that, yeah, this is what people do.

And in doing so we accept and forgive the people we love…and ourselves.
 

This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission.
Article contributed by
Advanced Member

John M. Grohol

Psychologist

Dr. John Grohol is a mental health expert and founder of Psych Central. He has been writing about online behavior, mental health and psychology issues, and the intersection of technology and psychology since 1992.

Location: Newburyport, MA
Credentials: PsyD
Website: PsychCentral
Other Articles/News by John M. Grohol:

Homecoming

By

What people do not see and may not understand is that the homecoming of a veteran is both a treasured event and a complex process. For a couple, in addition to all that it demands in terms of the reality of time, space, roles, money, kids and deployment cycles, homecoming means finding a way to integrate all that has happened to each partner into the ... Read more

Is Marriage A Good Deal Or An Ordeal?

By

There are lots of expectations about what marriage will provide that motivate people to choose it over the single life. Including … Love Companionship Regular sex Meaningful emotional connection Mutual support Financial and emotional security Material comfort A permanent ... Read more

5 Signs He's A Narcissist And You're Dating Him!

By

Basically, a relationship with a narcissist will be a problem, and the more narcissistic they are the more it becomes impossible. The continuum of narcissism Many psychological disorders are now being talked about as existing on a "spectrum", that is they are not like other diseases where either you have them or you don't. With spectrum ... Read more

See More

 
PARTNER POSTS
Latest Expert Videos
ASK YOURTANGO MORE QUESTIONS
Must-see Videos
SEE MORE VIDEOS
Most Popular