Ten Inconvenient Truths About Love

By

Ten Inconvenient Truths About Love
Read these ten truths about love that no one wants to talk about--see if you agree!

This guest article from Psych Central was written by Leigh Pretnar Cousins, MS

Today I am the Al Gore of romance, compiling a list of ten things which strike me as true, though not pretty, about Love.

Is facing them refreshing? Healthy? One of those Hey, look at that elephant in the room! sort of things?

That’s what I’m going for here.

And let’s see if you agree with me, and whether you’ve got some you’d like to add.

  1. Sometimes, when we love someone, we do them more harm than good.
  2. Sometimes, we love more than one person.
  3. It can be really hard to end a relationship, and therefore we often do it in messy, confusing, painful ways.
  4. Sometimes it’s impossible to let go of an old love until you’ve got a new one in its place.
  5. We lie because we want something very badly, that we are convinced we can’t have honestly.
  6. Being evasive, omitting important details, creating distractions, and all those other forms of “spin,” count as lying.
  7. We lie about why we lie. It’s not to protect the other person’s feelings or because “they couldn’t handle the truth.” The real reason is #5, above.
  8. We all lie.
  9. Your lover doesn’t always act in your best interest. Nor do you always act in theirs.
  10. I love you” may mean a great deal to the person having that feeling, but it often doesn’t gets translated into action that connects in a meaningful way to the loved one’s life.  The loved one may not even notice, let alone appreciate, the fact of being loved.

My hope is that we read these and accept that, yeah, this is what people do.

And in doing so we accept and forgive the people we love…and ourselves.
 

This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission from the author.
Article contributed by
Advanced Member

John M. Grohol

Psychologist

Dr. John Grohol is a mental health expert and founder of Psych Central. He has been writing about online behavior, mental health and psychology issues, and the intersection of technology and psychology since 1992.

Location: Newburyport, MA
Credentials: PsyD
Website: PsychCentral
Other Articles/News by John M. Grohol:

Navigating Through Life's Transitions

By

This guest article from Psych Central was written by Linda Bloom LCSW and Charlie Bloom MSW. Webster defines "transition" as a passage or process of changing from one form to another. It has been said that we live in a time of transition, of rapid change. Things in our fast paced society don't show signs of slowing down any time soon. ... Read more

The Crazy Reasons People Say Yes To Sex Are Shocking

By

This guest article from Psych Central was written by Eve Eschner Hogan. Why people have sex doesn't seem like it should be a mystery, but a study at the University of Texas asked that very question. We might assume that "it feels good," "I wanted to show my love" or "I wanted to get pregnant" were among the top contenders ... Read more

8 Pieces Of Common Advice That Will Derail Your Relationship

By

This guest article from Psych Central was written by Margarita Tartakovsky, M.S. When you're tying the knot, friends and family may share a few nuggets of advice for living happily ever after. If later you're going through a difficult time in your marriage, they may again be quick to share their input. You might even seek their guidance, hoping a ... Read more

See More

GET MORE ARTICLES LIKE THIS IN YOUR INBOX!

Sign up for our daily email and get the stories everyone is talking about.

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

FROM AROUND THE WEB