When it comes to romantic relationships there is one simple truth.
1. The quality of all relationships are inevitably tied to our level of self worth.
2. We get what we are willing to settle for in all areas of our lives, especially relationship.
4. Getting the relationship of your dreams is an inside job. It’s never about another person.
5. Real men are amazing. Real mean want to make their women really happy.
6. A happy woman is very pleasant to be around.
Most women have absolutely no idea how valuable or powerful they really are. There is a corrosive epidemic of low self esteem in our culture that is setting a tone for relationships that range from lack luster to down right dangerous. We have a tendency to want to explain it. It was our childhood. It was our college boyfriend. It is our weight or social status. That said, explanations don’t save us. Those stories, old and outdated keep us tied to broken self identities that fail us over and over again.
When it comes to romantic relationships there is one simple truth. We get exactly what we are willing to settle for. Whatever you have going on in your relationship, or not going on for that matter, is something you are settling for. Women set the bar in their romantic relationships. They have all the power, until they start to give it up. If you think you can’t do any better, you are absolutely right. If you think you deserve to be treated like a Goddess, you are also absolutely right - and you will be.
If you get face to face with any real man and ask him what he thinks sexy is, he will say a confident woman is always sexy. Every sex symbol through the years has exuded some form of magical confidence. A woman without confidence is lacking, empty, and wrinkled up inside. She is longing for any attention and will take it where she can get it from anyone, healthy or unhealthy, real or fake. This is a recipe for disaster. Unfortunately for most women, they never find their power, and the absence of that power leaves a legacy of failed relationships and pain that spans years or decades. Just by being born female, you were gifted with a magic that makes the world go round. Failing to own that simple truth, creates women who lack confidence, and settle for relationships that are far beneath them.
People will come to me and say I need to find my soul-mate or we need to fix our marriage, as if someone else is involved. No one else is ever involved. The relationship of your dreams is an inside job. It’s inside you, and no one else. At first glance that reality might seem overwhelming. At second glance, it’s the keys to the gate that sets you free for the rest of your life. When you are willing to recognize that no one other person is more important then your own happiness, you are home free. At that point you can have any relationship you chose to create. Until then, it’s any one’s guess.
For women who don’t know the power of their own worth, their experiences with men have often been less then wonderful. Women who lack confidence attract men who treat women as less then sacred. Women who do not love themselves deeply end of in relationships where the pursuit of love is dangerous. For those women who have not tapped in to their real value, men have been an unpleasant experience. That said, it wasn’t the fault of the men. It was the fault of the woman who didn’t demand to be respected and cherished. A real man, who is attracted to a real woman in her full glory is an amazing creature in his own right. Those men literally live to nurture, protect, and support their beautiful magical women. They are powerful strong beings who love to see their women happy and will move heaven and earth to insure that happiness.
Ladies, here is some really good news. There are still lots of those men out there, waiting for us to blossom into our most powerful selves. A happy woman is a very pleasant to be around and men love to bask in that beautiful glow. A confident, powerful, blissed out woman is like a drug for a well balanced man. They crave it, they pursue it, and they will do just about anything to keep it.
It’s time for a new story. It’s time for a revolution! It’s time to step into our power and glory as women and begin to tap in to that magic and mystery that is inside all of us. In that magic and mystery is the power to create the relationship of our dreams, and the life of our choosing. It’s time to leave a legacy for our daughters that shows them that women’s liberation is really about claiming our absolute feminine power. It’s time to take back all the control, and take care of the business of taking care of ourselves. Relationships are an inside job. You get to decide once and for all. What will you settle for?
Lisa Hayes C.Ht. is the Love Whisperer. She is a Law of Attraction Relationship Coach and author of The Passion Plan and Escape from Relationship Hell. She specializes in helping people get the love they want, no matter where they are in their lives. You can find her at her digit home, www.lisamhayes.com. Get her free audio, How to Talk to a Man, HERE.