Love, Self

YOU Deserve The Same Love You Give To Everyone Else

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love yourself

So, you’re a rock star at loving your friends, family, coworkers and significant other. That's amazing. But have you achieved rock star status at loving yourself yet? If not, why is everyone else worth that time, care and attention, but not you? 

Self-love is powerful. It's transformative. And it's about time you made it (and yourself) a priority.

Just consider yourself a masterpiece in progress. Your values, beliefs, and 'perfect imperfections' will change over time, but in every moment, you are always the exact person you need to be right now.

Knowing that, here’s why you need to lean into giving yourself the same love you give to others:

1. We need love like we need food

It’s true, love is a basic need. But when it includes others, love can come with heartache and fear. Self-love, however, is all about you, and you get to determine how that looks and what’s included.

2. You get to keep self-love forever

It doesn’t require anyone else’s approval and no one can take it away from you. There are very few things in this life we can keep forever, so keeping the best one is comforting and powerful.

3. You can't "earn" true love and self-worth 

Doing things for others may help you feel connected and validated in the moment, but, if always a one-way street, it drains your energy tank and leaves you feeling empty and anxious. Warning: If you feel most alive when helping others and empty when you’re alone, consider it a red flag signaling your belief that love must be earned.

4. Self-love helps grounds you in this world of disconnection

The technology that connects the world on the surface can also disconnect you from deeply knowing yourself. Loving yourself includes quality me-time and quiet introspection. The more you connect to your authentic self, the more you step into the power of trusting your intuition.

5. It’s your job to love you

It’s no one else’s responsibility to love you; that’s your responsibility. And when you cultivate that steady supply of love within yourself, it takes pressure off your other relationships. You're free to relax and enjoy the ride, choosing only people who truly deserve and value you.

6. You can’t give love if you don’t have any within you

How can you give something you don’t have? Loving others without expecting something in return, means that you must love yourself first. And that love always replenishes itself as you share it, so you never worry about running out.

7. If you don't love yourself, nobody else will

Incomplete people attract incomplete people. You're complete when you feel loved, valuable and respected. Self-love completes you and allows you to magnetize people who love themselves, as well. And that's the makings of relationships that truly feed your soul and light up your life. 

8. Someone always has your back (hint: you!) 

Having your own back means you can mess up, make mistakes, fall on your face and still feel just as valuable and lovable as before it happened. Yep, it's completely allowed. Self-love is the ultimate assurance that someone loves you no matter what.

9. You develop healthy boundaries

You confidently choose people and situations that are a good fit, without fear of ending up alone and unloved. You know that saying, "No," to someone else is saying, "Yes" to yourself and that’s not only OK, it’s healthy.

10. Your BFF is always with you

Be your best friend and you’ll always be in great company. As you may have noticed, friendships rarely last forever, and when they become unhealthy, it’s time to let them go. When you don't need a friendship to feel loved, you can walk away from it with the same love and confidence you walked in with. 

11. Your positive energy is a magnet for healthy people.

The peaceful, fun energy that comes with confidence from always feeling unconditionally loved attracts people into your life who treat you well and support you in becoming the woman you’re meant to be.

12. You’re confident regardless of circumstance

You exude confidence when you already have unconditional self-love. It catapults you into the self-confidence stratosphere where you know you can handle anything that comes your way.

Now that you see how important loving yourself is, does it make it easier to step through those initial feelings of guilt or undeserving and into your power? I hope so. Remember —You deserve the same love you give to everyone else. And you deserve to get it FIRST.

Kelly Rudolph is a Confidence Coach and founder of Positive Women Rock. She gives women the tools to get from stuck and stressed to clear and confident. Connect with her and get her free Life Strategies at PositiveWomenRock.com.