Love

5 Easy Ways To Attract New Love And Have The Best Holiday Ever

Photo: Getty Images | Unsplash 
Two people hugging in the snow

The holidays are a perfect time for dating. Our hearts are vulnerable, and those twangs of nostalgia tug at each of us, reminding us of our innate need to connect with our fellow humans.

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Here are 5 easy ways to attract new love and have the best holiday ever:

1. Sprinkle in some proactive love energy.

'Tis the season for giving, yes? Do something this year you've never done or that has been hidden on the back burner for years.

Pick up one manageable box of holiday cards and send one to the people who matter most to you. Say, "Thank you," for how they have contributed to you. Write as though it's their last holiday season on the planet.

   

   

2. Plan a plus-one party.

Don't plan it for December. Instead, plan for mid-January. Break up the mid-winter humdrum when more folks will be available to attend. It could be a fancy event, but some of the best parties are impromptu-friendly gatherings.

The trick? Each person's ticket for admission is to bring a fun friend ... someone you don't know. As the organizer, make sure you get each person's name, email address, and phone number. This is oh-so-valuable for relationship building for whom? Yes, for you! You just reward for organizing the event.

Of course, you get to follow up with each person who attends, developing new friendships and prospective amorous opportunities.

Photo via Getty

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3. Be the harmonizer at each of the holiday gatherings you attend.

There's always a drunk uncle, a grumpy teenager, or a catty co-worker to deal with. You can count on it, so plan for it. Take a few moments before walking in the door to the ground and center yourself, remember who you are, and call forth your best self.

Throw on an imaginary cloak that will shield you from negativity, hostility, animosity, mean-spiritedness, or just low-level and unconscious energy in the room. There will be bad situations present — as every family, organization, and community has its "stuff" — so be prepared psychologically and emotionally, and do all you can not to make a bad situation worse.

Let the little comments go, and resist the temptation to throw gasoline on any kindling fires. Watch for those hot spots and avoid them when you can. If you find yourself amid a firestorm, resist the temptation to engage and be the calming influence instead.

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4. Don't drink.

Can you do this? If you're the one who always heads straight to the bar, try being the person who doesn't. Imagine that. Go for cranberry juice and a splash of soda (a lime helps), and see what it's like to have your attention focused outward on other people, making sure they are having a great time. This alone can change everything for you.

5. Look for opportunities and watch for surprises.

Make it your mission each day of the holiday season to brighten the lives of those you cross paths. This includes the folks behind the wheels of the cars on your way to work during the morning commute. There's a real, live being in that car whose heart aches over something.

   

   

Look for those little opportunities to generate a smile on the face of a total stranger. Pick up the phone to call your mom, sister, or cousin you haven't talked to in years. Calling forth these actions will put wheels in motion, and you will see lovely surprises come your way

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Julie Ferman is a personal matchmaker, consultant, dating coach, media personality, professional speaker, producer of dating industry conferences and events, and blogger. She's been a guest on countless television shows including Good Morning America, The Today Show, Dr. Phil, and Fox News.