A couple of weeks ago, I was having a conversation about weddings; recent weddings of people I know, weddings that I had been in, and weddings from several years ago. In the midst of this discussion, I found myself contemplating what I would do at my own wedding compared to what others have done (because, you know, what single woman doesn't do that at least a little bit?). But rather than deciding what bridesmaids dresses I wanted or what kind of cake I wanted, I actually found myself wanting to ditch the more popular wedding traditions all together. The more and more I contemplated, the more I found myself wanting to ditch any tradition that seemed remotely impractical and to do things my own way.
Here are 5 wedding traditions I feel are worth ditching:
- Wedding Registries: In a modern world where everybody goes to college at the age of 18 rather than straight to married life, do we really need wedding registries? I'm gonna be honest: I already have enough dishes, towels, sheets, wall decorations, picture frames, and kitchen supplies from living on my own the last seven years of my life. Why would I want new stuff when what I already have is perfectly fine? If you want to give me money, then go for it. I can certainly benefit from some extra cash, but I don't really need some extra fancy bedding.
- Buying A Gown: One of the things I found interesting while living and teaching abroad in South Korea for 18 months was that none of the women there ever bought a wedding gown. Instead, everybody rented. At first I found this to be a little strange. I mean, how could a rental really fit properly and why wouldn't you want to own it? But the longer I thought about it, the more it made sense. Why buy a $3,000 dress that you're only going to wear for one day and then spend all this money later to preserve it so it can sit in your closet? It just doesn't make any sense.
- Diamond Engagement Rings: Though I certainly enjoy having some pieces of gorgeous jewelry, whenever it comes to engagement rings I can't help but find myself thinking, "God that's a lot of money to spend on just a ring." Personally, I'd rather have a nicer place to live, a more fuel efficient car, or a vacation to Europe or the Caribbean.
- The Groom Not Seeing The Bride Before The Wedding: I don't know how many weddings I've gone to where I had to deal with this super long wait between the wedding ceremony and the reception because the bride and groom didn't want to see each other to take pictures before the wedding. Has there been any correlation between couples who didn't follow this tradition and a greater chance of divorce? I highly doubt it, so I think I'd rather make things more convenient for my guests than to be concerned about my future husband seeing me in the white dress before the ceremony.
- Women Changing Their Last Name: This seems like a silly thing for me not to do considering that I clearly have a complex last name that nobody is ever able to pronounce correctly, and I have to spell it out all the time. Because of this, I actually spent most of my childhood anxiously anticipating the day that I could have a different last name so I wouldn't have the added stress that comes with it. Yet, at the age of 27 I can't help but ask myself, "Why bother?" Let's be honest, it's taken me nearly 20 years to master writing my own signature with it's grand total of 18 letters. On top of that, I have everything that's mine under my current name. Why on earth would I want to go through the hassle of changing everything? I'd rather opt-in for keeping it simple for myself.
What wedding traditions do you want to ditch? What wedding traditions do you find impractical or just plain silly?
Jennifer Twardowski is the founder of www.jennifertwardowski.com. Here she helps women improve their relationships with both themselves and others, both personally and professionally, so that they can create lives filled with joy, love and support. Jennifer has been featured in Cosmopolitan magazine, TinyBuddha, Elephant Journal, and Purpose Fairy. Click here for her FREE Self and Relationship Healing Meditation.
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