It won’t be easy, but these 3 steps will give you the best start for getting over your divorce.
You know that attorneys and mediators are there to help you get through all the legalities of the divorce, but they don’t begin to help you deal with the misery, the hurt, and the pain of divorce.
So here you are reading article after article on the web hoping that you’ll find the answer you’re looking for.
There are 3 steps you need to take to learn how to heal after a divorce. These are the answers you’re looking for:
1. Be kind and compassionate with yourself.
Getting divorced isn’t anything that you planned on happening. Realizing that your marriage is over is a horrible shock to absorb. This shock will naturally cause your thoughts and emotions to go into a spin as you try to make sense of the new reality you’re facing.
Becoming impatient with yourself is the worst thing you can do right now. You’re experiencing one of life’s most difficult challenges and you must take care of yourself in order to make it through your divorce as easily as possible.
So remember that you’re doing the best you can. Some days will be better than others. Heck, some minutes will be better than others. Getting divorced is hard and it’s OK to not feel 100 percent like yourself as you start (and continue) your healing process.
2. Build your self-esteem.
Feeling that you’re a failure or even that you must not be lovable because you’re getting divorced? As horrible as it is to feel this way, it’s also really normal.
One of the casualties of divorce is your self-esteem. So the sooner you can start doing things to help you feel good about you again, the more energy and drive you’ll have to figure out how to start healing.
3. Ask for help.
Healing from divorce is incredibly difficult. You deserve to have support as you navigate this painful time in your life.
Asking for the help you want and deserve is one of the smartest things you can do. It’s so much easier to get through your divorce as quickly and thoroughly as possible when you’ve got someone on your side who genuinely cares about you and isn’t impacted by your divorce.
Seek out help from someone who really knows what getting divorced is like — they’ve been through it themselves and have successfully put their own divorce behind them. It’s these people who will be best able to empathize with you and offer real suggestions to you for how to start healing after a divorce.
Learning how to start getting over the end of a marriage is vitally important. But, it’s just the beginning of your healing process.
Getting over a divorce is a long and uncertain road. But by taking care of you, you will be starting off on the right foot.
And the good news is that by learning to take care of yourself now, you’ll have this vital skill in place to help you truly get over your divorce so things will stop sucking as much as they do right now. You will start moving out of feeling so miserable, lost, alone and afraid and into feeling really good about you and your life again.
Dr. Karen Finn is a divorce coach who helps people just like you who want support getting through their divorce. You can join her newsletter group for free advice or schedule a FREE 30-minute conversation with Karen directly in her Time Trade calendar.
This article was originally published at Dr. Karen Finn's blog. Reprinted with permission from the author.