"I'm too old" is something older people frequently say after a divorce or the death of a spouse. They feel they are too old to start over, to meet someone new, to date again.
But I also find that more and more people are deciding that simply isn't true. We are living longer and healthier lives, and for many people, that means looking to meet someone special even very late in life. Few people in their 50s consider themselves too old to try to date, but increasingly people in their 60s, 70s or even 80s are willing to give it a try and are finding it rewarding.
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As a psychologist in private practice, I often meet people who have been divorced more than once who decide I'm just not cut out to be married or part of a couple, I won't even try. My response is, "Practice makes perfect!" If we have any smarts at all we learn from our losses and mistakes and get even better at defining what makes us happy and what we want in a relationship. Some of the happiest, most satisfied couples I see are couples who met in later years.
What Older Women Want
Research consistently shows that women (more than men) initiate divorce. This is especially true in long-term marriages. Women who divorce from their partners in their 50s and 60s are looking for compatible mates. It is true that some who divorce are done with marriage, but many of these women still want to date. And what do they look for when they date? The same thing as men: companionship, fun and sex! Older single women who date are predominantly financially secure. They aren't looking for someone to support nor do they need someone to take care of them financially. They want someone they can talk to, who they can share interests and activities with, and who want to rekindle romance in their lives as well.
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Not Dirty Old Men
Older men who want to date have been the subject of ridicule in the past. But the fact is, those who had good sex lives in the past and found it enjoyable are still interested as they age. Viagra revolutionized sex for men by helping older men to maintain sexual function. Now, few can perform the sexual athletics of younger men, but sex can still be very pleasurable and rewarding. Men are not just looking for sex, however. Men seek the same things women do in relationships: companionship, support, compatible interests and values. Keep reading...
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