Love

3 Tiny Things Smart Women Do So Their Men Never Want To Cheat

Photo:  Anastasya Ignateva | Canva 
Couple hugging each other

So many women worry that their husbands, boyfriends, or significant others will cheat. The Ashley Madison scandal is a prime example of how real and prevalent infidelity is. Hackers released the names of 37 million Ashley Madison users, exposing them to the world and to their wives, who "didn’t know" about the affair (i.e. either they had no idea, they ignored their intuition, or they knew it and accepted it). According to data collected from The Normal Bar, 33 percent of men confess their unfaithfulness … but that’s just those who admit it. So, can you keep your man from straying? Possibly.

According to a 2013 Texas A&M study, men might cheat simply because they have stronger impulses. And reducing those impulses (this is where you come in, wives) can make your man less likely to cheat. One thing I should mention in all fairness — there is NO guarantee that he will NEVER cheat. As long as free will exists, your husband has the option to stray. However, smart women know there are simple things you can do to encourage a BETTER marriage so that they won’t want to cheat. What you have to do is to put real love and connection back into your relationship. Here is how they keep their husbands' hearts focused on them forever.

RELATED: 5 Major Mistakes I've Made As A Wife (And You Probably Have, Too)

Here are 3 simple things smart women do so their men never want to cheat:

1. They hug their guy every single day

The physical nature of your relationship is important. It includes: holding hands, looking into each other's eyes, kissing, caressing, and making love. This may seem obvious, but too often we overlook and forget to simply reach out and touch our partner. If this is so for you, then set time aside for intimacy, affection, and physical contact. Don't get so caught up in the day-to-day of living that you take your relationship for granted. 

   

   

I suggest hugging in passing, a kiss in an appropriate moment, or any physically loving gesture that you can do throughout the day. The busier your schedule becomes and the more hectic your lives feel, the more important these quick, loving physical gestures are to the health of your relationship. That said, we all need deeper intimacy. Each couple must make time for longer periods of togetherness. For example, setting time aside at least once per week for more prolonged, intimate activities. (And if you miss one week you can always do two the next!)

RELATED: 5 Phrases Husbands Need To Hear Their Wives Say At Least Once Per Month

2. They make time to talk 

Connecting at the mental level helps keep couples together and healthy, frequent communication is key to any successful relationship. If you don’t communicate with your partner regularly, how can you expect to know what they're feeling? How could they possibly know what you're feeling if you don’t tell them? Too often, we find that we're speaking at one another instead of with one another. I suggest dedicating 15 minutes a day to just TALKING with each other. On a good day, you can tell each other what you appreciate and love about one another. On a not-so-good day, you can discuss what your particular issue, problem, or concern is. But don't make it the "Honey, we need to talk" kind of talk. Connect. Be friends. You're on the same team.

   

   

RELATED: 5 Deep, Emotional Needs Your Partner Must Meet For A Relationship To Last

3. They know how to just be there for him

Being in the same room together is not the same thing as actually "being" together. The latter requires mindfulness — an awareness of (and presence in) what's going on in the present moment. And, being in your relationship is all about noticing what's going on with your spouse in the here and now. What's his mood? What does his body language tell you? You can't meet your husband's needs if you're not truly noticing what they are. The little things you notice and respond to in a positive way help make your relationship stronger.

In our distracted society (TVs, cell phones, and digital devices), you might need to practice this heightened awareness of your spouse, your surroundings, and your relationship. Begin by finding moments between moments and focus on one thing and one thing only. (You can start by putting your phone away.) It's hard for a man to feel loved when his wife's attention constantly feels only half there. Remember, whether your man cheats is ultimately out of your control. But, whether or not you pour your affection and attention into your marriage is entirely your choice. The odds that your husband will cheat decreases when your love makes him feel good. 

RELATED: The 2 Things Every Good Wife Does For Her Husband

Dr. Eris is the founder of FEEL GOOD DR, Therapize Me, and co-creator of the HELP SELF methodology. She has shared her expert advice on the psychology of human behaviors on HLN’s Dr. Drew On Call, Nancy Grace, Jeff Probst Show, Hallmark Channel, NPR, Entertainment Tonight, and more.