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4 Dating Pitfalls Of Intelligent Women

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asian woman with large glasses
Got brains?
Is your intellect an asset or a liability?

If you're an Intellectual Badass (IB), you're bound to date people who aren't as smart as you. Either you'll know more about your specific area of expertise, or you'll outsmart them across the board.

As with any asset, a formidable intellect can work against you in dating. If you're bright and you want to succeed at dating, there are some pitfalls to avoid:

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1. Being a know-it-all. Some IBs are like human encyclopedias. You can be sitting at dinner, drinking wine, and this person will go on and on about the science behind winemaking. Or, no matter what topic you bring up, this person knows more about it and wants to make sure you know that. So how do you share your knowledge, which the right person will find fascinating, without boring or annoying them?

Start small — make a comment about why hot days and cool evenings make for better wine. If they're really into it, they'll ask for more. But even then, don't go on and on.

2. Talking down to your date. Yes, at some point you will date someone who says something you disagree with or, even more challenging, something that's just plain wrong. But there's a fine line between standing by your beliefs and talking down to someone. It's perfectly okay to make your stance known or to offer your brief argument, but the moment you descend into criticizing their beliefs (no matter how ignorant) or behaving like you're the wise one, you're finished.

Don't be a Sheldon Cooper. He's hilarious on the Big Bang Theory, but in real life he'd be an intolerable jerk.

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3. Correcting others. Perhaps he says he feels "nauseous" after eating so much, when he should have said "nauseated." Yes, that's wrong. But I recommend you let it go. Why? Cost-benefit: The benefit of showing him the correct word will always fall short of the cost of having made him feel self-conscious. You never want to make someone feel stupid. Keep reading.

More dating advice from YourTango:

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Dr. Christie Hartman

Author

Christie Hartman, PhD
Author, Behavioral Scientist, and Dating Expert
My Amazon page
http://www.christiehartman.com/

Location: Denver, CO
Credentials: PhD
Other Articles/News by Dr. Christie Hartman:

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