Sometimes all it takes is a simple word to get things started with someone you're attracted to.
I remember when I was in summer camp, I went to a place called Brandt Lake Camp in the Adirondack Mountains in New York. There was a sister camp called Point-O-Pines. We used to have what we called “socials”, so the awkward 11 and 12-year-olds could meet the other awkward 11 and 12-year-olds. Our counselors would talk us up and say, “Alright guys, come on, don't just stand there. Talk to the girls.”
I remember going to my first social and all the boys were standing on one side of the room and the girls on the other. The head of the camp came out and he said, “Guys, go talk to any girl you want.”
We all stood there with lead feet. The second social it was the girls' choice. What did the girls do when the female head of camp said, “Go pick and talk to a boy you want to talk to.”
They nervously edged over and started talking to us.
How different is it now?
It's the exact same way it was when we were 11 and 12 years old. We haven't grown, despite how many self-help books we read. No matter how many relationships we've had. Whenever you put men and women in a room together, you can see them on opposite ends of the room, and watch them do absolutely nothing. It's amazing. Yet we both crave and desire love. We both crave and desire great sex.
We're all waiting for the other one to give us a sign. It's amazing. There should be a sign in all these social situations. They should just say “Dead End”, because there's always a dead end no matter what you do.
We all want the same thing, yet when we see somebody we're attracted to, we do absolutely nothing.
Women are waiting for men to talk, and men are waiting for women to give them a sign. As a woman, what can you do?
Well, you could just say “hi.” The next time you see a cute guy, just smile at them and say “hi.” If he can't do anything and he wants to act like the 11 or 12-year-old boy from Brandt Lake Camp, then so be it. At least you did something and you're no longer waiting for something to happen. We have to stop the waiting, and we have to ALL start doing. When I coach my men, I'm constantly telling them to take action.
A simple "hi" is all it takes. If he speaks back great. If not, move on.