You just went through a divorce. You look around the house and everything is different. Your ex's stuff is gone and you feel a sense of relief. Yet, sad at the same time. As you walk through the house you find something of his and you remember the memory that was attached to it. Maybe it was from a time when you were happy together and seeing it makes you feel sad and alone. It makes you wonder if you did the right thing.
You are always going to have those feelings. When a relationship ends, it is sad. Especially when you know it is ending and you start to become a detached observer, watching two former lovers slowly drift apart. These thoughts arrive. "Wow, did I do the right thing?" "Are we making the right decision?" "Can we save this?" The answer is no. 5 Ways Divorce Benefits Your Kids
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There are reasons that you have come to this. Respect them. Sit in the pain for as long as you need to. Then begin to move on. Let's talk about how to feel better and how to heal. Here are three things that I recommend for anybody who has recently separated or divorced.
1. Take a vacation. If you have kids, get somebody to watch them. Have your ex watch the kids. You need a couple of days away, preferably a week. Go on a vacation with a good friend or go by yourself. Try somewhere fun or somewhere healing. Go to an island or the beach. Do something that you love. Whatever and wherever the vacation is, go there. Don't go on vacation with the intention of meeting the other divorcees. Go and be by yourself or go with a friend and reflect. Heal and have fun. It is very important.
2. Meet new people. Make sure you have one night a week that you go out and meet new people. Whether it is a bar, restaurant or a class, you need to start getting out there. It is not about finding your next relationship. That is not important at all right now. It is about connecting with new people and having the support that you will need to move forward. It's so important to do this because it will make you feel free, open and help you to realize that the world is abundent with interesting people that you can have a good time with. Rejected After Sex: What Did You Do Wrong?
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3. Date. Date only when you are ready and only when you have processed your last relationship. Processing a relationship takes time and it's different for everyone. For some of us it takes a while. Some people are not ready to date for a year, while others are not ready to date for a month. But, you do not have to listen to your friends.
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