Many of my dating coaching clients tell me they don't remember how to flirt or else they never knew how. I say that just won't do! To help my 40+ dating clients, I've created an acronym that explains what it means to flirt. Once you start using this innate feminine skill, your dating karma will be transformed. I'm not sure why women resist the powers of flirtation when we were born with this ability, but my goal is to help as many women as possible turn on their inner man-magnet so that they can get the desired results: to find love with the right guy!
"F" stands for Femininity.
This is your God-given ability to appeal to men. It was coded into your DNA to ensure survival of the species and the ability to attract a mate. Nothing can remove this from your being because it is part of you at the deepest level. Unfortunately for some women, this has been buried deeply and suppressed. It has been replaced by staunch independence to survive without a partner. Self-reliance has caused many women to build up their more masculine qualities and nurture a successful career with financial independence.
This is all good stuff. Hey, as women today, we don't need men any more. We can literally do everything without having a partner, including having children. But, and this is big, if you want a man in your life, you need to be in touch with your feminine charm. Men don't want to compete in a relationship because they're seeking their biological counterpart: a feminine woman.
As a side note, "F" could also stand for "Fun" because flirting is such a blast. It's a playful, creative way to interact with men and get them to come to you by using your allure.
"L" stands for Lovability.
Ultimately, that's what you want right? To be loved. So, first, you'll want to be lovable. You want to embody love and exemplify the love you want, so men see you in such a light. On the flip side, if you are angry at all men, spend large amounts of time man-bashing with your gal pals, and have lost the ability to see that not all men are the same, you do not portray a "lovable" energy. To be lovable, you need to exude warmth, a welcoming attitude, and approach life and people with an open heart. That's the only way to make a heart connection. I'm not talking about wearing your heart on your sleeve, letting your emotions run you, or sharing your feelings prematurely.
Instead, when you are lovable, you are easy to be with, kind, sassy, pleasant, open, fun, warm, intelligent — many of the qualities you already are! Couple that with an optimistic outlook on men and love, and there you are: more lovable than you can imagine.
Of course "L" could also stand for "Liberating" and a more "Ladylike" side, rather than leading with your business skills and masculine energy.
"I" stands for being simply Irresistible.
A woman who knows how to flirt and relies on her feminine charm surely is irresistible to men. When you see a woman at an event or party who is surrounded by men, she is demonstrating this ability — you can see how positively men tend to respond to this energy.
When I worked in the corporate world, I must admit I despised women who traded on their femininity for success. Decades later, I see the power and potential of doing so, and have a newfound respect for the women who know how to succeed in business and still maintain their womanhood. Today, I not only applaud this, but encourage women to do this for success in love as well.
The "I" might also stand for an "Intelligent" woman who indulges in a little flirtation because she knows she can and understands the power this aspect of her personality offers.
More dating coach advice from YourTango: