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3 Surprising Reasons He Doesn't Listen to You

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3 Surprising Reasons He Doesn't Listen to You
The real reason your husband or boyfriend tunes you out—and what to do about it.

"Why won't he listen to me?"

If you've ever said that, you might be surprised to find that you can change the pattern without changing him at all!

More from YourTango: 4 Deal-Breaker Mistakes You Don't Know You're Making

Here are 3 surprising reasons your husband or boyfriend doesn't listen. Try out my tips and see what changes...

1. You talk too much (without saying more).

Because many women suffer from a feeling of not being heard, they try to make up for it by talking more than necessary.

A man will often tune out his wife or girlfriend after 10-15 minutes. When he does, she intuitively notices she's not being heard and talks more, in an attempt to get his attention.

Men pick up on an energy of resentment and often deal with it by tuning out even more. Have you ever experienced a moment like that?

Your husband or boyfriend will listen better if you just share what you want to say in a few minutes.

2. You catch him at the wrong time.

Some women ask their men to listen when they're already in the middle of something.

Of course, you want his attention, but if he's already focused on something else, he naturally won't be able to give it to you 100%. Talk before he starts a project—and if you forget before he gets started, respect his time and let him finish.

3. You believe he won't listen.

If you've ever been caught in the first two patterns, you probably found yourself saying again, "He just never listens!"

When you put that belief out there, you only set the stage for it to happen again. Great communication is the foundation of any good marriage. So communicate what you need. Try this:

"Honey, I really want you to pay 100% attention to what I want to share with you.
When could you give me that?"

It is okay and appropriate to expect that attention and time from him! When he gives it to you, share what you want in a time frame that honors his attention span and your needs.

He will be shocked when you say, "I'm done." He will exclaim, "Really?" And he'll be even more willing to listen the next time.

I wish you all the best in communicating in your relationship with respect and love.

More from YourTango: Why It's Time to Throw Out Your Little Black Dress

God Bless You,
Carol Tuttle

PS. Want some tips that the men need to hear now? Check out this blog post to discover the simplest, easiest way that men can make women truly happy.

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