Do you want to give your sweetheart something extra special for Valentine's Day? Are you tired of the same old flowers, candy, corny greeting card and dinner routine? As lovely and appreciated as these gifts can be, what if this year you give your beloved something that they would never see coming, something that will make both of you happy and is totally free?
Here’s what I’m suggesting:
Give your beloved Wabi Sabi Valentine's Amnesty for the one thing you most complain, argue, or harass them about. Wabi Sabi is the ancient Japanese art of finding the beauty and perfection in the imperfect, flawed and what the world would see as unattractive. In my new book, Wabi Sabi Love, I share stories, tips and techniques for living out Wabi Sabi with your beloved. For now, here is how to give them Amnesty this Valentine's Day.
Decide right now to figure out how to create a new story for yourself about that thing your mate does that drives you crazy. Find the beauty and perfection in it, and then GIFT them with your vow to finally let it go.Whether it’s the wet towels on the floor, the toilet seat left up, the dirty dishes in the sink, the constant texting at the dinner table, squeezing the toothpaste from the middle of the tube, forgetting to take out the trash, interrupting you when you are on the phone, or whatever transgression you have deemed unbearable. Loving A Wabi Sabi Sloppy Joe
If you want to deepen your experience, your mate will benefit greatly from your choice to ask yourself these questions:
- How many more times am I willing to allow this situation to annoy me?
- What payoff do I get by finding fault in my partner?
- What does being “annoyed” keep me from having?
- Where did I learn to be annoyed by other people’s behavior?
Next, imagine that your mate’s annoying behavior exists solely to teach you how to become a more loving and compassionate person. Then, upon reflection, please write down three (or more) gifts of the offending behavior.Looking for the gifts is a priceless gesture in a world in which you can’t control others behavior. While our partners may never change the quirks and idiosyncrasies that we find maddening, you can change your perceptions of them. A Wabi Sabi Lesson on Self Love
This Valentines Day make a shift from “annoyed to enjoyed” and let your beloved know by sharing this free, very special Wabi Sabi Valentine's Day Amnesty Vow with them.