Finding your soul mate and your one true love and being with them (and ONLY them) for the rest of your life has always seemed like the ultimate cultural ideal. We're often presented with the idea that monogamous relationships are what we should want and strive for in our romantic lives.
However, monogamy isn't realistic for many people. In fact, many view monogamous relationships as unattainable, old-fashioned, and some even find it to be unnatural — especially in our modern-day society.
The belief that we are meant to love only one person for our entire lives doesn't work for everyone. We're not all made to love the same way, and the types of relationships that for some don't always work for others.
Here are some opinions on why some people think monogamy is unrealistic:
1. When it comes to sex and love, expectations are different.
"I don't believe in monogamy when it comes to sex. I do however believe in monogamy in relationships. But I differentiate sex and love."
2. Monogamy just isn't natural.
"I don't believe in monogamy. I don't think it's how we are meant to live."
3. Throughout life, what we want in our relationships may change.
"I was raised in a very Christian home, I no longer believe in monogamy. I have an ex wife and an ex fiance. I don't think anyone has ever truly been 100% faithful in any relationship."
4. Monogamy is a social construct.
"Monogamy is a made up construct. Just wish my husband agreed ..."
5. You feel it just isn't a part of human nature.
"People look down on me because I don't believe in monogamy, feels very unnatural to me. Ever since I was young I've never been faithful in any relationship. My husband is amazing. I feel guilty."
6. We need diversity in our relationships.
"I don't believe in monogamy. One person can't give you everything you need. We need many different people in our lives for many different needs. I want an open relationship."
7. No one is faithful anymore.
"Monogamy is dead. Even the nicest girls are hoes on the down low."
8. Science doesn't back it up.
"I'm a biologist. Of course I don't believe in monogamy."
9. Monogamy isn't for everyone.
"I don't believe in monogamy or love. Sometimes I just want sex without anything else. Sometimes I don't want to be bothered by another human being. I am not relationship material."
10. Your personal experiences have proved that monogamy isn't realistic.
"Every monogamous relationship I've ever seen has failed. I don't think lifelong monogamy is a real thing."
11. You have your own version of what soul mate means.
"I don't believe in monogamy, but I do believe in soul mates. I think every person has at least two, one of each sex."
12. When you think of relationships like pizza...
"In my opinion monogamy is force fed upon us by society, religion, and women. You don't just eat one kind of pizza the rest of your existence..."
13. Monogamy is too restricting.
"I don't believe in monogamy. I love my husband but why can't we just have more fun? Life is too short."
14. Freedom is important.
"I don't believe in monogamy. I don't participate in jealousy. I believe in connection. I want to be free."
15. Being non-monogamous isn't a new thing.
"I don't think monogamy is natural. All throughout history there's been mistresses. In some countries, they don't practice monogamous relationships."
16. Monogamy is dishonest.
"I don't believe in monogamy. I believe in honesty."
17. You're not a romantic.
"Monogamy isn't realistic, yet I try so hard to behave like it is."
18. The concept of being someone's one and only is scary.
"I don't believe in monogamy. Forever with someone doesn't make me feel secure, it makes me thoroughly terrified."
19. We should be free to love however we want to love.
"I don't believe in monogamy. You shouldn't have to control and repress your natural urges and attractions because society says you should."
20. Monogamy is boring.
"Monogamy isn't for me. I like to see multiple guys at once, it keeps things interesting."
21. You have different relationship goals.
"I don't want to commit to anyone ever. I don't believe in monogamy or being locked into any sort of relationship with any individuals. Like companionship but not all the time or with the same people."
22. It's hard to have faith in monogamy when no one seems to be truly loyal to each other.
"I don't believe in monogamy. Every couple I know- he or she, sooner or later-has been unfaithful."
23. You don't believe in monogamy, but you won't EVER settle for being someone's second choice.
"I don't want to be someone's one and only. I don't believe in monogamy. I just want to be someone's favorite."