15 Harsh Signs Your Job Is Killing Your Relationship

Are your career goals ruining your love life?

man and woman working side by side DimaBerlin/ Shutterstock
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One thing that never ceases to amaze me is how much a person’s career influences them.

Studies have shown that having certain careers can influence whether you divorce or stay loyal. In fact, who you date is often influenced by your career as well.

Unfortunately, having the wrong job can also destroy your love life.

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Here are 15 signs your job killed your relationship: 

1. Your career is seriously stigmatized

Though it’s not impossible, if you’re in a career that’s associated with sex work, your job can make it extremely difficult to get hitched. Many, many strippers, adult models, and escorts have had people dump them on the spot when they heard of the job. Other guys may also get pressured into dumping you by family members who have preconceived notions. It’s not fair, but it’s the truth.

2. Your hours are insane

If you work two full-time jobs, you’re going to have a serious problem keeping a relationship going. Too many work hours will make anyone feel like you’re neglecting them, even if the reason you’re working so hard is them.

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3. The job you work is killing you on the inside

As much as we want to think we can compartmentalize our lives, stress is something that often carries over into other parts of our world. If you feel like you’re about to snap at work, don’t be shocked if you come home to a partner who always feels like they need to walk on eggshells around you.

4. Your job keeps you flat broke

As much as it pains me to say this, the amount of money you make is directly proportional to the chances you have of finding and keeping someone interested in you. It’s a prejudice that tends to hurt men more than women, but realistically, it’s hard to stay with anyone who is too broke to pull together a nice date once in a while.

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5. You’ve had more than one partner complain about your job

I’m very iffy about saying that a complaint about a job is something that you should worry about in a relationship because there are many abusers out there who got their victims to quit good jobs. However, if this is a regular pattern, you may need to think about your career choice.

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6. Your job has preemptively advised you to choose it over your partner

If this happens, then the fact is that the job you’re in has killed a lot of relationships. That’s a very bad sign.

7. Your work-life balance is way off-kilter

Most of the time, people have a good idea when their job is taking over every little aspect of their life. If you legitimately can’t find time to date people or have a relationship, then the reason you're single is because of your job.

8. Your boss slept with your significant other

This has legit happened to my ex and resulted in major love-life problems for a very long time. If your boss has regularly barred you from seeing certain girls who aren’t even part of the company, then you need to switch jobs.

9. Your job can be considered a threat to your current partner

Yes, men do get very threatened by women in high-power, high-paying positions. They also can get threatened or insecure if the girl they’re seeing works in high society, while they themselves don’t know much other than blue-collar. Is this a reason to quit your job? No.

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Is this a reason you should rethink the guy you’re dating? Absolutely, yes. Men who are so insecure that they can’t handle a female breadwinner are men that just aren’t worth dating.

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10. Your job or career path is demanding of your spouse, too

There are certain careers out there that basically require a spouse to act certain ways, dress certain ways, and present themselves in certain ways. If your career requires a trophy spouse or similar, this isn’t something that everyone can handle.

11. When you’re working, you regularly get hit on or flirt with a specific person in your department

Here’s something that might scare a lot of married people: the most common way someone finds an affair partner is through work.

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And it makes sense when you realize you’re spending over one-third of your day with those people. If you’re noticing an affair beginning to form, you need to nip that in the bud before your job destroys your relationship.

12. Your coworkers regularly tear down the guy you’re seeing

Do your coworkers poke fun at your spouse for not having a degree or not owning a shiny new car? Though it’s subtle, these kinds of things can seriously hurt your relationship and your view of your partner. You might want to distance yourself from these vipers and look for a new job.

13. Your career forces you to stay away from your partner for long swaths of time

Sorry to say, but this is a love killer. There is, after all, a reason why many military marriages end up in divorce.

Long-distance relationships are very hard on both partners and, after a while, most partnerships end up succumbing to the hassles that come with them.

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14. You get so into your job that you’ve forgotten date nights, anniversaries, and birthdays

This is bad. Like, very bad. If you’re that consumed by your work, you may have a serious problem with your priorities and your family life, too.

If it’s gotten this bad, you need to do your partner a favor and break it off. Chances are that you’re married to your career and won’t miss them anyway.

15. Your job killed your sex life

If you can’t get in the mood after work, there’s a problem. No sex life is a sign that you’re doing something very wrong with your relationship. You might want to fix that, soon. 

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Ossiana Tepfenhart is a writer whose work has been featured in Yahoo, BRIDES, Your Daily Dish, New Theory Magazine, and others.