Love, Family

5 Brutally Honest Tips For Dating A Single Mom (As Written By One)

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Benefits Of Dating As A Single Mom

Dating as a single mom isn't easy. Aside from the lack of time issue, many of us are leery of getting deeply involved with another man because we've been hurt too many times before. We treat each new man with a healthy dose of skepticism.

However, when you're ready, there are actually a few benefits to dating as a single mom. Here's 5 of them:

1. Natural selection makes it easy to weed out the weak men.

When a man is suddenly no longer interested because he hears I have six kids, well, it's pretty obvious he's not a strong enough man for me. Or, if a date is angry because I had to cancel last minute due to a sick child, I know he's not the kind of man who can handle the demands of a large family.

I will answer any time my kids call me. So, you better be a very secure man yourself and realize you will not always have my 100% attention. My kids come first.

2. My teenage boys are as protective of me now as my dad was when I was 16.

Don't disrespect me and expect it to be overlooked. Trust me when I tell you that one phone call or text from me, and my three older boys will be here to take me home faster than you can say, "But baby, what's wrong?"

And three teenage boys protecting their momma are as scary as a daddy protecting his 16-year-old daughter.

3. I've got no time for games, so my expectations are very clear from the start.

I'm not looking for a replacement daddy for my kids or a replacement husband for myself. You'll never be left wondering where you stand with me.

As unromantic as it sounds, a date is something I have to pencil in to my already overly-crowded schedule, so do not waste my time. We will take it slow and see where it goes.

Don't try and push me into anything, either. I'm pretty strong and will push you so far back you'll quickly be out of the picture.

4. My house is completely off-limits.

My family and my home are my sanctuary, and you haven't been invited in. So, don't ask.

You will not meet my children until I'm sure I want you around for a long time, and I'm even more sure you will stay around for a long time. Don't mess with my kids. That means stay away until invited.

This non-negotiable rule also makes it really easy at the end of a bad date to just end it quickly and get home. It alleviates the boring "let's just watch a movie" date. Dude, if I want to just watch a movie at home, I'll be in my own bed, in my pajamas, eating ice cream. Alone. Be a bit more creative.

5. I can do my own home repairs, thank you very much.

I don't need you to fix my car, mow my lawn, or help me install a new ceiling fan. Me and the other single moms I know are strong, independent moms. We've learned our way around home improvement projects and repairs. 

In my small group of single mom friends, we've helped each other install plumbing, fix drywall, put together furniture, and lay new flooring. We've got this. And if we get stuck, our local home improvement store is just a phone call away.

However, if I do ask for your help with a home repair, it means you've passed rules one through four, and can count yourself as one very lucky guy.