Guarantee that second date!
A first date is like an onion: it needs peeling one layer at a time. You need to gently allow your partner to reveal themselves and to avoid trying to plunge in with those deep, personal questions that go straight to the core. Here are some perfect ways to show interest and help someone open up on a first date, without placing them on the defensive.
1. What do you do for a living?
It may not be the most scintillating question to ask, but it does show you're taking an interest in their life beyond the here-and-now of the date. It's also a question that opens up all kinds of avenues for discussion and discovery.
2. Who would you most like to share dinner with?
This is a simple variation on the dream celebrity dinner party scenario. It narrows the guests down to just one person and gives you the chance to find out what your date admires, desires and wants from a date.
3. Do you like to travel?
This simple question helps you to find out if someone is adventurous or a homebody. It will also give you the chance to talk about places you may both have visited, discover what constraints there may be on your date travelling and discuss favourite places.
4. Where to?
Spontaneity can really help people to begin to feel at ease. By arriving with a set of possible places to go, you can let your date choose. This allows you to find out what they like to do and provides plenty to talk about in those first few awkward moments.
5. Where do you feel most relaxed?
One of the best ways to get people to open up is to do so yourself. Tell them where you like to relax, and why, before you ask the same of them. It's a sure-fire way to get to know your date on a deeper level without being intrusive.
6. What's one thing about you that would surprise me?
First dates are about fun and gentle discovery – this question offers both.
7. That's interesting!
Dates are not all about probing questions. They're also about listening to, and learning about, someone else. Let them know you're doing this.
8. Let me get that for you.
Whether you're male or female, it doesn't hurt to open the door for your date or offer to pay. Remember that if they insist on 'going Dutch' you should give in gracefully without making a fuss.
9. Thanks for a good time.
Be polite if the date has not gone as you may have wished. Likewise, make sure you let them know if it has — tell them that you've enjoyed their company.
10. Can I call you?
You also need to leave them in no doubt that you'd like to see them again for a second date. No-one likes to be left guessing.
More juicy content from eHarmony UK:
- Five Things You Should NEVER Say On A First Date
- 20 Celebs You Can't Believe Are Single
- How To Make A Long Distance Relationship Work