I got an S.O.S call from my friend Sylvia last night. After only three online dates, she was on the brink of insanity. We debriefed about her dates from hell and I had to be the bearer of bad news. "You are picking the wrong guys." The Frisky: 10 Online Dating Profile Dealbreakers I'm Sick Of Encountering
"How do you know?" she asked, mortified.
"Show me their profiles and I'll tell you why."
Twenty minutes later I was deep into an OKCupid intervention, looking through profile after douchebag profile. And yes. The guys she went out with were wrong. After pointing out phrases that made dudes potentially undateable, I found a few gems that she never would have picked, but seemed well-worthy of a chance. I can't believe some of the crap that these dudes were saying about themselves. I mean, you have the opportunity to put your best foot forward and you go and tell the ladies the very worst things about yourself? It’s shocking. But even more shocking is the fact that intelligent, good-looking ladies (like Sylvia) don't even notice. Below are some online profile phrases that let you know he's a mess.
1. "I'm looking for fun!" This guy is NOT looking for a serious relationship. He just told you so. He's not lying. He most likely rents party buses and lives on the couch of his old frat house. If fun and just fun is also what you're looking for, message him. If not, click on through, sister
2. "My life is under construction. Bring your hard hat." One fine gentleman actually phrased it like this. This man is floundering. He is lost at sea in his life. He doesn't know who the hell he is or what the hell is looking for in a woman. Forget it.
3. "I hate most people." Good god. Why is he advertising this? Well, the good news is, you know he's a total misanthrope and you don't have to spend a long, miserable first date with him. The Frisky: 8 Big Mistakes Women Make On Their Online Dating Profiles