Well, we're ankle deep in wedding season, with the real push starting Memorial Day and Vera Wang Chung-ing it straight through Labor Day. And while wedding planning is a Big Deal, it seems that the biggest concern for most wedding parties is the pictures. In fact, the second biggest wedding fear for lots of ladies (between a no-show husband and saying the wrong name) is that the photos will somehow get funked up. Many brides, grooms and mothers of the bride are strict adherents to the saying that, while your marriage may not last forever, the photographs will. But while a wedding is huge, the days, weeks and decades after, it can be argued, are far more important.
My point being that the whole operation seems to be a contrived photo op.
More from YourTango: Who Are You Trying To Fool With Those Spanx?
To get good-lookin' photos, makeup is over-applied, beautiful brides are sewn into expensive gowns and haircuts trend towards the eerily perfect, all for the sake of the camera lens and the scrapbooks. Because of posterity, the wedding party will transform: weight will be lost (yeah skinny bride diet), bronzer will be spread liberally and heretofore unseen hairstyles will be tossed onto well-meaning heads until the participants are virtually unrecognizable. I understand the desire to look your best, but is it really looking your best when you don't look like yourself? Here Comes The (Fat) Bride
Our buds at Guyism mention that Minnesota Viking Jared Allen is making a Samson-esque move for his wedding. The Pro Bowl defensive end has shorn his trademark mullet for his wedding photos, and I'm guessing his beard is to follow. A good friend once was asked to shave his 7-year-old beard a fortnight before his nuptials. After removing his whiskers, his fiancée declared that he looked like a kid-toucher, and demanded that he regrow the damned thing immediately, if not sooner.
More from YourTango: I Love You, Now Stop Making Me Fat
Again, I'm all for everyone looking nice, but only one person (and maybe her mother or daughter) will look at those pictures or videos after a couple of years. Maybe let's concentrate on having a relaxed, great time. Frankly, I can't recall ever seeing a bride who was anything short of beautiful. Sorry for partying.
Tell me why I'm wrong.