5 Small Psychological Tricks That Give You Quiet Confidence In Any Situation

You deserve to take up space.

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We face challenges every day, both big and small in scale. Whether you’re giving a presentation at work or attending a party where you don’t know anyone, it’s normal to feel nervous and wonder if you’re accomplished enough to be where you are.

While some people are naturally confident, it’s not always an easy personality trait to foster. Yet confidence functions like a muscle: The more you use it, the stronger it gets.

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Here are 5 small psychological tricks to give you quiet confidence in any situation:

1. Pause before speaking

Give yourself some time to gather your thoughts before responding to a question. 

Taking two to three seconds of silence not only allows you a moment to collect yourself but also projects an air of confidence. By waiting to speak, you let the person you’re talking to know that what you have to say is valuable and worth listening to carefully.

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It might feel awkward not to answer immediately, but taking that pause can also center and ground you in high-stress situations, like presentations or meetings.

Practice by taking a breath in and releasing it before you speak up.

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When you do say your piece, use a calm yet sure tone of voice to show just how confident and powerful you are.

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2. Use self-assured body language

If you cross your arms, hunch your shoulders, or look at the ground when you speak, you’re giving off an insecure vibe, which makes people less likely to take what you say seriously.

@patricia.cnr If you need help to overcome challenges in your life and boost your confidence, click the link in bio for 1:1 Coaching with me 💫 #coaching #selfimprovement #confidencecoach #confidence #bodylanguage ♬ Boy's a Liar - PinkPantheress

Instead, use your body language to let everyone know just how successful you are.

Stand up straight and drop your shoulders. Make eye contact, smile, and give firm handshakes when you meet someone.

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You might not feel entirely comfortable making these body language changes, but with time, you’ll come to naturally hold yourself with confidence, which will make you feel confident. There’s truth to the saying, “Fake it ‘til you make it,” especially when it comes to believing in yourself.

You’re allowed to take up space — so let your body do just that!

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3. Stay interested

There's a fine line between confidence and arrogance. One way to make sure you fall on the right side of that divide is to stay interested in the people around you and invest in your community.

The trick to being the most interesting person in the room, someone who everyone is drawn to, is cultivating a quiet sense of self-assurance and being genuinely intrigued by the people you’re with.

You learn more about a person by really hearing what they’re saying, so listen more than you speak

@12weekrelationships What are other things that help you actively listen to someone you care about?#friendship #communication #couples #activelistening #relationships ♬ original sound - Doctor Glen and Pye

Ask thoughtful, intuitive questions that keep the conversation moving. Don’t be afraid to dive deep into more complex topics.

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The key to connection is being present.

4. Learn something new every day

Being confident requires keeping an open mind and seeking out what you don’t know. Stay sharp by devoting a little time each day to learning something outside of your realm of knowledge.

Make time to read, even if it’s just for half an hour. Check out a new podcast or watch an interview with someone you admire.

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Having empathy for others also goes a long way. If you see other people as having something to teach you, you’ll learn new perspectives and outlooks on life.

5. Practice gratitude.

Remind yourself just how worthy you are by writing down what you like about yourself and what wins you’ve accomplished. In moments of low self-esteem, look back at your list and remember just how wonderful you are.

Document things you’ve done that you’re proud of, as well as challenges you’ve overcome.

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@melrobbins I bet you’re practicing gratitude all wrong. I realized I was once I started digging into the research. Today, instead of creating a generic list of things you’re thankful for, try going deeper. Start right now – write it down in the comments. Only then will you experience the true feeling of gratitude ❤️ Happy Thanksgiving to those who celebrate! #melrobbins #changeyourlife #mindset #createabetterlife #takecontrol #motivation #happythanksgiving #gratitude #grateful #thankful #gratitudepractice ♬ original sound - Mel Robbins

Holding space for gratitude is an accessible practice to lift your spirits and acknowledge your own inherent worthiness in this world.

Never forget how far you’ve come, especially as you continue on your journey into your impossibly bright future.

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Alexandra Blogier is a writer on YourTango's news and entertainment team. She covers social issues, pop culture, and all things to do with the entertainment industry.