Is This Habit Keeping You Single?


Tired of waiting? Tired of affirmations, positive thinking, blind dates, and online dating?

Are you working your tail off to meet someone, seeing zero results and searching for an escape hatch? If you have been looking for your soulmate for years and getting nowhere, maybe you need to stop trying so hard and sit still long enough to assess where you really are.

In fact, when you are trying your hardest and things are not working out in your life, it is time for a break and your answer is hiding in a most unexpected place. As I teach in The Map: Finding the Magic and Meaning in the Story of Your Life, understanding the workings of your mind is the only sure way to make sense of your outer surroundings.

The Inner landscape of your mind is made up of your reactions to your singleness.

Your reactions...which are based upon your thinking...control and disguise the inner wisdom you need to see your way through a difficult time. In the many, many readings I have done over the years I hear people complain about where they are, ask how long they have to stay there and complain about the unfairness of life that has gotten them there.

Before I wrote the Map, I struggled to get them to understand the VALUE of their current experience. Now that the I can point them to the archetypical scenarios that all face on the way to full self expression, the light of their aha moments sparks their innate ingenuity and bingo....they finally get it and find their way to love.

If you find yourself in a Barren Desert where it is hot as hell and there is no water in sight, the first thing to do is to accept where you are. To some, myself included, the desert is a beautiful place. The expansiveness, silence, brightness of the sunlight and tenaciousness of the flora and fauna are exquisite. But it would not be so if I were dressed for an arctic winter.

To endure the desert extremes, you must be prepared. There really isn’t anywhere to hide in the desert and if you are going to survive that is your first and most important lesson.

Let me ask you a question, oh Desert Dweller...what ARE you hiding from? What part of yourself are you afraid to face? What deed have you done or what mistake have you made that you are hiding from yourself?

Next: Five reasons to stop complaining...

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This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission from the author.