Photo: @chloebluffcakes / TikTok
She is breaking down "daddy privilege."
By Megan Quinn — Written on Mar 02, 2023
When it comes to parenting, there is often a double standard that exists between moms and dads.
Moms are usually the ones expected to drop everything to care for the children, no matter what they were planning on doing.
Whenever dad decides to take his turn to feed or change the baby, he is praised as a God.
One mother took to TikTok to hilariously point out what she calls “daddy privilege” after her husband decided to bring their baby along with him to run an errand.
The mom claims her husband was applauded after he took their baby to run an errand while she is ignored when doing the same thing.
Chloe Sexton is a baker running her business “Bluff Cakes” from her Memphis, Tennessee home.
While her husband works a typical 9-5 job and is not home during the day, Sexton is in charge of childcare.
Since her business requires her to purchase fresh ingredients every week, this means that she often has to bring their infant son along with her to the grocery store.
While she never expects praise from strangers for running errands with her baby strapped to her, a recent incident had Sexton questioning the different standards we hold for mothers as opposed to fathers.
On a day when her husband had off from work, he offered to run to the store to pick up the ingredients for her business, taking their son with him.
Sexton claims that her husband was treated like a “hero” by other shoppers and cashiers at the store she treks to weekly, even though she has never received the same treatment, despite always having her baby with her.
“I’m strapped up with a baby or seven months pregnant hauling 100-pound bags at a time of flour to the back of my Subaru,” she shares.
All the while, others simply glance her way and do not say or word to her or offer to help.
“Just a woman doing woman things busting her a-–!”
Meanwhile, Sexton’s husband had all eyes on him as customers were impressed with him for performing the duties his wife does weekly.
Despite helping her out by running an errand for her, Sexton emphasizes the fact that her husband is not a hero.
“He’s just a father, just a parent doing the same s-–t I do every week,” she says.
Other mothers related to Sexton and her experience with her husband.
“Greatness is expected of women but are somehow never appreciated for it,” one TikTok user commented.
“Mom alone on flight with kids…death stares and negative comments. Dad alone on flight with kids…flight attendants falling over to help,” another user pointed out.
“Dads get treated like KINGS for even the bare minimum of fatherhood. It is absolute bulls–-t how mothers are treated in comparison. The bar is so low,” another user wrote.
Some fathers shared their own experiences of being applauded for simply parenting their children.
“I change a diaper and get praised like I’m father of the year but the mother goes through birth, feeds the baby and takes care of them and NOTHING?!” one dad commented.
“I can confirm it’s either hero treatment or ‘oh, how cute! Is Daddy babysitting today?’ NO! I’m just taking care of my child. That’s parenting,” another user shared.
Sexton explained what she calls ‘daddy privilege’ in an interview with NewsNation.
“Daddy privilege is something that if you’re a father in the relationship, you’re gonna step in without even trying every little thing you do that is seen as a basic parental duty gains praise,” she says.
“You make a meal for your family, [people say] ‘what would they do without you? You run to the grocery store for something you don’t have and [people say] ‘what an amazing father!”
Sexton claims that partnerships have changed over the last few years and duties should be divided equally between parents.
She believes that both mothers and fathers deserve some praise.
“You should be telling a father, ‘you’re doing a great job, do you need some help?” Sexton says.
The same attention should be given to mothers.
As the interviewer who is talking with Sexton accurately points out, all parents are heroes and make the world go round, regardless of their gender.
Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.