Photo: TikTok / Natalia Lebedinskaia / Shutterstock.com
This might upset some people.
By Isaac Serna-Diez — Written on Apr 17, 2022
“I debated posting this because I know how bad it’s going to be when people get this answer from me, but there were so many people that asked,” said an increasingly popular divorce attorney who goes by @jettiegirl28 on TikTok.
The divorce lawyer who previously received 1.7 million views on a video we covered where she talked about the top 5 professions women should avoid when marrying a man is back with the opposite: the top profession that men should avoid when marrying a woman.
This video has gotten even more attention than the previous with over 4.1 million views as people everywhere are dying to know what profession a man should avoid in their spouse.
According to this divorce lawyer, the top profession for a man to avoid in a woman is a stay-at-home mom.
“The most common profession that I see in the female parties in my divorces, and this is over 13 years of cases,” she says, before nervously revealing the answer, is a stay-at-home mom.”
“Can I just say that you call it a PROFESSION,” reads the top comment on TikTok, and while some argue that it isn’t a profession because SAHMs don’t get paid, the sentiment is still there.
Being a stay-at-home parent is not easy, and many people argue that it actually should be treated as a profession where people should be paid for raising and taking care of society’s future.
However, outside of that, there are many reasons why a stay-at-home mom might have one of the highest divorce rates.
“A lot of you thought that those same professions for men that I told you to avoid would translate to women, and they really don’t,” she explains.
She admits that she fears backlash and hate for revealing that stay-at-home moms have the highest divorce rate in her experience, but she goes into detail on why this is the case.
“Number one: when you’re divorcing a stay-at-home mom, they are paralyzed with fear, and rightfully so, because their whole life is going to change,” she starts.
Stay-at-home moms typically rely on their spouses to be the breadwinners and remain financially stable, but if you take that away, then they panic in the face of their uncertain future.
“They tend to stick their head in the sand and stall, and so the cases become very contested and very expensive,” she says.
This makes perfect sense, and the comments agree.
“Being a SAHM is one of the most vulnerable positions a woman can be in. I could never do that to myself,” said another one of the top comments.
It’s not easy to go from full-time parent, which is an unrewarding profession as far as actually making a living, to trying to go back into the workforce and worrying about living arrangements or custody or simply making ends meet.
The second reason, she reveals, is simply an observation she’s made in the past and her own opinion, but relates to the first reason and that is that it’s easier for the pair to grow apart.
“The husband starts feeling like an ATM, and the wife becomes completely focused on the children,” she says.
Being a stay-at-home mom has become widely under-appreciated and is very difficult to maintain alongside other aspects of a marriage.
The two start to feel unappreciated by the other, and they will simply drift until a divorce is inevitable.
It takes real work and communication to not let that happen, but it’s more difficult than it looks.
Despite thinking she would receive a lot of hatred for her video, a lot of people agreed, citing their own experiences as SAHM or divorce attorneys or children of any party that is related.
Of course, these are just opinions based on one woman’s career and not any real romantic advice or national statistic — there’s no need to avoid SAHMs like the plague, just something to keep in mind.
Isaac Serna-Diez is a writer who focuses on entertainment and news, social justice, and politics. Follow him on Twitter.