4 Tips To Letting Go Of The Past

Love, Heartbreak

Forgiveness starts with one person-YOU.

Many women go through life holding on to things that happened days, months or years ago. Everyone has a past and a story, but the things that happened in your life yesterday don't have to determine your tomorrow.  Here is how to move on and free yourself from your past, once and for all.

1. Forgive yourself.  Everyone has things from their past that they wish they could go back and do differently.  If you're holding onto guilt from something you've done, it's time to ask for forgiveness...from yourself.  Maybe you cheated on a great guy, or broke up with a boyfriend suddenly and immediately regretted it.  No matter what the situation, you're harder on yourself than anyone else could ever be.  Own it, but have compassion on yourself, recognize what you did wrong and make a concerted effort to never repeat the mistake. 

2. Keep moving forward. Sometimes we feel so guilty about something from the past that we inadvertently repeat the same behaviors over and over again, because it's all we are thinking about.  Keep your mind focused on where you want to be and the kind of relationship you want to have in the future, not stuck in the hamster wheel of regret.  Make decisions every day that propel you forward, even if they scare you.  Heck, especially if they scare you.

3. Talk it out.  If you're upset about a relationship that went south, you don't necessarily need to speak to the other person. Sometimes talking it out with a friend can help put it all in perspective. When you keep your feelings about the past locked inside, they can begin to consume you.  Once you're able to voice your thoughts and feelings to someone who's opinion you trust, you might find that you begin to feel free from the chains of the past.

4. Remember that you deserve more.  So, you messed up.  You did something baaaad...but guess what? You still deserve all the goodness that life and love have to offer you. Look yourself in the mirror and repeat "I deserve good!" until you're blue in the face. Sounds cheesy, and hey it might be, but it's important to always remember that life isn't trying to punish you...so stop punishing yourself!