Secrets From A Matchmaker: How To Find Love

couple hugging

Here are some matchmaker secrets on how to turn those first dates into long-lasting relationships!

Do you have friends who seem to be brilliant at dating? Don’t be too quick to admire if they aren’t in fact turning any of these multitude of dates into anything resembling a relationship. A great matchmaker can certainly find you any number of potentially great partners, but how can you take that terrific opportunity and turn it into something sensational? It’s important to remember that it is not about luck, it’s about talent meets opportunity, and you’re the talent.

Your professional Matchmaker will definitely give you some tips, but let me fill you in on some of the secrets now:

Be positive!


Don’t go into a date with a mind-set of failure that permeates the experience. The first step is manners. Manners are a wonderful thing as they show consideration, care, interest, kindness and class. Showing up ahead of, or at least right on time is a great way to start.

Smell good.


Never underestimate the importance of smelling great. Research has determined that human attraction is a result of chemical messengers called pheromones that trigger everything from physical and sexual attraction to deep emotions of love. So make sure you wear a fresh shirt or outfit with a touch of perfume or cologne and sparks may just fly!

Put your date at ease.


Be warm and open rather than closed and guarded, what have you got to lose? Don’t be afraid to tell a funny story or even laugh at yourself – a playful nature is one of the most attractive traits in a person.

Don’t turn your date into an interview!

We Pow

When you don’t know someone it’s natural to ask questions, but try to focus on having fun, light-hearted conversation. Asking so many questions that you end up with their life CV in one sitting is a major turn off.

Put some thought into where you chose to have your date.

Fan Pop

Meeting at a gallery viewing for instance takes some of the pressure off as you can talk about what you are seeing and experiencing. Do you have somewhere specific in mind close by to continue the date one on one, or are you standing on the street corner with no idea? Be imaginative for a second date and propose a wine tasting or a cooking class, there’s bound to be plenty of opportunity for humor and easy conversation. Feeding the ducks in the park pond, or a trip to the zoo can be just as cool if not more so than a flashy and impressive bar, but check the weather forecast! Going somewhere or doing something new for both of you becomes a shared dating experience.

The point is, your first and second date setting, plans and conversation contributes enormously to allowing both of you to be relaxed and most importantly, yourselves! The secret of great dates is keeping conversation light-hearted, funny and intriguing with a good helping of kindness and manners.

Rachel Maclynn is a Chartered Business Psychologist and Founder of The Vida Consultancy, a world-leading, luxury matchmaking service. Contact us to find out how we can help you find your life partner.


This article was originally published at The Vida Consultancy. Reprinted with permission from the author.